18 minutes ago, MigL said:

To be fair, that was an old 'Dave Allan at Large' joke.

He did a lot of Religion jokes.

He's not laughing now.(great delivery that man)

I liked Brendan Grace too.

12 hours ago, geordief said:

He's not laughing now.

You just reminded me of a Bob Monkhouse joke with that line.

"I told them I wanted to be a comedian. They aren't laughing now"

4 hours ago, StringJunky said:

You just reminded me of a Bob Monkhouse joke with that line.

"I told them I wanted to be a comedian. They aren't laughing now"

Must be where I heard it.

This is one of my favorites.

My girlfriend told me I was average. 

 

She is so mean!

1 minute ago, Imagine Everything said:

My girlfriend told me I was average. 

 

She is so mean!

At least she thinks you’re normal

 

Full version:

https://www.facebook.com/ianbremmer/videos/trump-chicken/2742678942412375/

 

or

https://www.google.com/search?q=trump+house+of+wings

 

On 2/22/2025 at 6:28 PM, Sensei said:

 

Full version:

https://www.facebook.com/ianbremmer/videos/trump-chicken/2742678942412375/

 

 

 

It's good, but it needs more accordion.

 

1 hour ago, John Cuthber said:

It's good, but it needs more accordion.

 

This is a top secret message that should cause hallucinations.. :)

He has more such gestures in his library..

 

 

https://cdn.theguardian.tv/mainwebsite/2017/05/25/170525macrontrumphandshake2_desk.mp4

Src: https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2025/feb/28/donald-trump-body-language-keir-starmer-us-president

ps. By the way, he forgot to say “nice to meet you, Mr. Governor of France”.

 

ps2. There is even study about his gestures: https://www.google.com/search?q=trump+gestures

 

Edited February 28Feb 28 by Sensei

A yes; body language.

https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=1615756388457722

 

 

Today I learned that you can wear a canoe on your head.

 

 

 

If you turn them over, they are cap sized.

17 hours ago, iNow said:

Clever, very clever. +1

 

That is how I see science, just when I think I understand something,it changes or progresses into more..

A linguistics professor says during a lecture that,

“In English, a double negative forms a positive. But in some languages, such as Russian, a double negative is still a negative.

However, in no language in the world can a double positive form a negative.” 

 

But then a voice from the back of the room piped up, “Yeah, right.”

 

 

 

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson were going camping. They pitched their tent under the stars and went to sleep. Some time in the middle of the night, Holmes woke Watson up and said, 

“Watson, look up at the sky, and tell me what you see.”

Watson replied, “I see millions and millions of stars.”

Holmes asked, “And what do you deduce from that?”

Watson replied, “Well, if there are millions of stars, and if even a few of those have planets, it’s quite likely there are some planets like Earth out there. And if there are a few planets like Earth out there, there might also be life.”

Holmes said, “Watson, you idiot, it means that somebody stole our tent.”

It has many uses..

Speaking of which..

For first time in human history, women will be inside the penis instead of the other way around

A biologist, a physicist, and a mathematician are standing in front of an empty house.

They all observe two people walk in, and three people walk out.

The biologist tries to explain the phenomenon by stating, “Well, they must have reproduced.”

The physicist offers a different explanation, “There must have been an error in measurement.”

Then, the mathematician says, “If one more person walks in, then the house will be empty again.”

On 4/14/2025 at 8:53 PM, iNow said:

For first time in human history, women will be inside the penis instead of the other way around

Ssssh it's not really true... it's just a phallusy. 😉

Edited April 16Apr 16 by Imagine Everything

I think this hilariously stupid music video qualifies for the jokes thread, especially given that it's lead vocalist was aboard Jeff Bezos suborbital penis flight. A crew member of the member, so to speak.

Some good comments in this collection of clips from the British satirical panel game “Have I Got News For You” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hG5osfcZ_gk

If nothing else, the Freudian slip in the clip 30secs from the end is worth watching.

Don't often see an electrical joke :-)