How to post on Science forums: A guide for Quacks
This is satire, so if you find yourself agreeing with the recommendations …
Such as
So, you’ve made your post and put your point across, but now people are asking questions. It’s annoying and unfair, but sometimes people will not automatically take what you’ve written as absolute truth, and will instead ask for some evidence. Don’t panic! “Evidence” is blustering scientific shorthand for “I know you’re winning, and all I can do is try to stall you.”
Post the same argument again. And again if necessary. If it doesn’t work the first 37 times then it will definitely work the 38th, the 38th is the charm. There’s an old saying about idiocy being the act of trying again what you know has repeatedly failed before. This is not true. Gambling addicts aren’t wrong for not knowing when to quit, they’re wrong because they finally quit just one throw of the dice too soon. So keep at it. Remember, repetition trumps proof, so if questioned simply repeat the claim as if a) nobody has questioned it and b) the truth of your claim is clearly a given. Do this often enough and your claim becomes true. You may have to continue this for some time; science works by repeatedly saying your theory until enough people agree. Whoever shouts loudest wins, and since you’re up against the combined forces of Big Pharma and Big Science you’ll need to shout very loud and very long. Hang in there!















