Sirona Posted March 7, 2016 Share Posted March 7, 2016 (edited) We read about that, where people some people still see themselves as overweight and then they actually become anorexic. I'm not saying that is the case, but in your case as you say it is an insecurity because of the past. Have you tried saying affirmations? It was a craze many years ago. I'm not close to anorexic, nor do I see myself as overweight; I'm healthy and fit. I'm just saying that when you spend much of your formative years being bullied about your weight, it's difficult to see yourself as attractive once you lose it. I don't really want to elaborate because it's quite personal as I'm sure you can understand. However, I thought it was necessary to use myself as evidence to support that most men are really not attracted to overweight girls and I say that from personal experience. I've noticed an extraordinary change in the way men see me since losing weight and that's because it's natural to be attracted to healthy and fit people. I don't feel resentful because men can't really help what they're attracted too. Although the OP might have a competitive advantage being attracted to overweight women, most men will compete with other men for women who have qualities that are considered attractive. Edited March 7, 2016 by Sirona Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Robittybob1 Posted March 7, 2016 Share Posted March 7, 2016 I'm not close to anorexic, nor do I see myself as overweight; I'm healthy and fit. I'm just saying that when you spend much of your formative years being bullied about your weight, it's difficult to see yourself as attractive once you lose it. I don't really want to elaborate because it's quite personal as I'm sure you can understand. However, I thought it was necessary to use myself as evidence to support that most men are really not attracted to overweight girls and I say that from personal experience. I've noticed an extraordinary change in the way men see me since losing weight and that's because it's natural to be attracted to healthy and fit people. I don't feel resentful because men can't really help what they're attracted too. Although the OP might have a competitive advantage being attracted to overweight women, most men will compete with other men for women who have qualities that are considered attractive. Fair enough, but I'd also say I tended to be attracted to heavier women too. It was something I noticed but I kept it to myself, in fact this is the first time I have admitted it publicly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ajb Posted March 7, 2016 Share Posted March 7, 2016 It is clear that, at least in the 'Western World', that there is some social pressures here, especially when younger, in relation to larger women. The reality is that plenty of guys like larger women... I’m 185 pounds, can catch a d*ck whenever I want... Amy Schumer Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sirona Posted March 7, 2016 Share Posted March 7, 2016 Fair enough, but I'd also say I tended to be attracted to heavier women too. It was something I noticed but I kept it to myself, in fact this is the first time I have admitted it publicly. Exactly, you kept it to yourself; that alone suggests there is a social stigma against bigger women. You're 62 now, Robitty? and you've just admitted to it openly. Yet, even know you're protected by your online anonymity. I'm not singling you out, nor am I offended; I just learned early on that life is much more difficult when you're overweight and it's a hindrance, not just in dating but other aspects of life too such as friendships, career, hobbies etc. I noticed men were also less respectful towards me, in many cases (and rightly so) believing that due to my lack of male attention I'd be more willing to please them, satisfy them and be more agreeable since I didn't have a lot of choice. Although this is a natural and true assumption to make, they believe they've made a compromise (risking being socially outcast and/or judged) so they can get love, companionship or sex more easily. I can tell you it's both humiliating and demoralising being on the other side. Now that my body is equal to my face, for better lack of expression, I am finding myself with all sorts of opportunities, especially career wise. A lot of bigger women I know are resentful and bitter about how they are received by society and the disadvantages that come with being overweight. However, to change societies views is very difficult, changing yourself is achievable and for me, it had nothing to do with pressure but 'adaption' is a more correct way of putting it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Robittybob1 Posted March 7, 2016 Share Posted March 7, 2016 It reminded me of the switchboard for the different sexes. http://www.blog.joelx.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/02/man-woman-control-panel.gif Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sirona Posted March 7, 2016 Share Posted March 7, 2016 (edited) It reminded me of the switchboard for the different sexes. http://www.blog.joelx.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/02/man-woman-control-panel.gif Ha! I've always considered myself an uncomplicated woman; I must've been too generous in my assumption Edited March 7, 2016 by Sirona Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Robittybob1 Posted March 7, 2016 Share Posted March 7, 2016 Ha! I've always considered myself an uncomplicated woman; I must've been too generous in my assumption I'm sitting here worried I might throw the wrong switch! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sirona Posted March 7, 2016 Share Posted March 7, 2016 I'm sitting here worried I might throw the wrong switch! That's terrible if I've given you that impression because it's not at all the case. I'm merely trying to represent the perspective from the other side seeing this thread was being dominated by male observation. I'm interested in the male psyche, so please do be honest and not hold back your opinions. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Robittybob1 Posted March 7, 2016 Share Posted March 7, 2016 That's terrible if I've given you that impression because it's not at all the case. I'm merely trying to represent the perspective from the other side seeing this thread was being dominated by male observation. I'm interested in the male psyche, so please do be honest and not hold back your opinions. Was I just trying to get out of having to express my psyche? I'm not even sure if I know myself that well. On the other threads I think they would find me complicated, yet I think of myself as being fairly basic, yet with the ambition to improve. I'll be back but I've got to feed the calves before it gets too hot. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Robittybob1 Posted March 8, 2016 Share Posted March 8, 2016 I'm sitting here worried I might throw the wrong switch! You might understand this. I'm here to solve science issues as my first priority but friends are good too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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