I saw this on the PA forums, and just had to post it here for those people that don't visit:

 

http://www.thingsmygirlfriendandihavearguedabout.com/

 

It's extremely funny and hence it's taken up most of my afternoon. Enjoy

Margret doesn't like to watch films on the TV. No, hold on - let me make sure you've got the inflection here: Margret doesn't like to watch films on the TV. She says she does, but years of bitter experience have proven that what she actually wants is to sit by me while I narrate the entire bleeding film to her. 'Who's she?', 'Why did he get shot?', 'I thought that one was on their side?', 'Is that a bomb' - 'JUST WATCH IT! IN THE NAME OF GOD, JUST WATCH IT!' The hellish mirror-image of this is when she furnishes me, deaf to my pleading, with her commentary. Chair-clawing suspense being assaulted mercilessly from behind by such interjections as, 'Hey! Look! They're the cushions we've got.', 'Isn't she the one who does that tampon advert?' and, on one famous occasion, 'Oh, I've seen this - he gets killed at the end.'

 

lollyroffle

 

Dave, are you the dave on PA too?

Unfortunately, some bugger got there before me. Instead I went for the highly imaginative title 'dave20' instead

 

Don't post there much, used to in the programming forums a bit but they got a bit boring really so I stopped. Infact, the last one I posted was a solution for one of MrL's maths problems.

The best one I've seen so far is:

 

The other evening we had some friends round. We were all sitting in the living room and I was recounting something Margret had done a couple of days previously. Unfortunately, I can't remember what this thing was now, but I do recall it had happened in the car. So, given Margret and I stepping into a car together immediately invalidates our insurance (a Zen branch of homologous algebra states: Mil + Margret + Car = Small Child + Hammer + Land Mine), it could have been pretty much anything up to and including some kind of western movie-style showdown where - instead of being atop a train - Margret and I scrambled for control of a Colt .45 on the roof of our Vauxhall Corsa, as it careered, driverless, down the A5. As I say, I can't remember. Anyway, whatever it was, it was certainly (a) utterly outrageous and (b) utterly down to Margret. This is borne out by the look of numb, stunned disbelief that trembled on our friends' faces when I'd finished telling them the story. One of them turned to Margret and, incredulous, gasped, 'Did you really do that?'

'Yeah,' Margret laughed back, with a shy, 'you know how it is' shrug. Then she became pensive and her nose twisted a little in thought. 'But,' she continued, half to herself, 'I don't know if I'd have done it in real life.'

"In real life"?

What?

WHAT?

'Will you bring back that filing cabinet from Argos?' she asks. Can you, ladies and gentlemen, imagine a person cycling two miles through Christmas traffic on a mountain bike carrying a filing cabinet?

Margret can.

rofl

 

(i can actually envisage that happening to my dad)

What are the PA forums?

The forums for Planetarion, an evil empire in the guise of an online game.

 

"Cool" kids play for a round then retire to General Discussions

Yeah, I read the PA forums mainly for amusement but they seem to have gone downhill in the past few months, especially GD - not surprisingly really.

Hehee, I've seen this once before, love it! Though the link was sent to me by my boyfriend, I hope he's not trying to tell me something...

Morrgan==Margret?

Noooo, I'm nice! Honest!