Jump to content

Rakdos

Senior Members
  • Posts

    522
  • Joined

  • Last visited

Everything posted by Rakdos

  1. Rakdos

    Power Outage

    power company removed it smoking charred carcass form the transformer
  2. squirrel got fried his nuts are black and chrispy that must have hurt bad
  3. 17 m in i havent been wasted in 1...10 seconds oh this isnt NA
  4. Don't Kick the Animals, Man A boy awoke and wanted breakfast so he told his mother. She said, "Not until you feed the animals." The boy went outside and said to the chicken, "I don't feel like feeding you today." So he kicked the chicken. He did the same with the cow and the pig. The boy then went back into the house and told his mother he was hungry. His mother said, "I saw you kick the chicken so you're not getting any eggs, I saw you kick the cow so you're not getting any milk and I saw kick the pig so you're not getting any bacon." Just then the boy's father walked down the steps and tripped over and kicked the cat and the boy said, "Mom should I tell him?"
  5. Q: If mothers have Mother's Day and fathers have Father's Day, what do single guys have? A: Palm Sunday
  6. A teacher asks her class, ''If there are 5 birds sitting on a fence and you shoot one of them, how many will be left?'' She calls on little Johnny. ''None, they all fly away with the first gunshot.'' The teacher replies, ''The correct answer is 4, but I like your thinking.'' Then Little Johnny says, ''I have a question for YOU. There are three women sitting on a bench having ice cream. One is delicately licking the sides of the triple scoop of ice cream. The second is gobbling down the top and sucking the cone. The third is biting off the top of the ice cream. Which one is married?'' The teacher, blushing a great deal, replies, ''Well I suppose the one that's gobbled down the top and sucked the cone.'' ''The correct answer is the one with the wedding ring on...but I like your thinking.''
  7. Bumper Stickers II All men are idiots, and I married their King. So many stupid people... so few comets. Your kid may be an honors student, but you're still an idiot. Cover me. I'm changing lanes. I Brake for no apparent reason. Learn from your parents' mistakes -- use birth control. Forget about World Peace...Visualize using your turn signal. Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math. It IS as bad as you think, and they ARE out to get you. Auntie Em, Hate you, hate Kansas, taking the dog. Dorothy. Time is what keeps everything from happening at once. I love cats...they taste just like chicken. Out of my mind. Back in five minutes. The more people I meet, the more I like my dog. Work is for people who don't know how to fish. Montana -- At least our cows are sane! I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian. Wom en who seek to be equal to men lack ambition. If you don't like the news, go out and make some. Sorry, I don't date outside my species. Reality is a crutch for people who can't handle drugs. Where there's a will, I want to be in it. OK, who stopped payment on my reality check? Few women admit their age; fewer men act it. I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it. Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off NOW. It's lonely at the top, but you eat better. According to my calculations, the problem doesn't exist. Give me ambiguity or give me something else. We are born naked, wet, and hungry. Then things get worse. Make it idiot-proof and someone will make a better idiot. Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else. Very funny, Scotty, now beam down my clothes. Puritanism: The haunting fear that someone, somewhere m ay be happy. Consciousness: That annoying time between naps. Be nice to your kids. They'll choose your nursing home. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder... There are 3 kinds of people: those who can count & those who can't. Keep honking...I'm reloading....
  8. young man is wandering around the zoo looking at the animals. He suddenly remembers about an appointment that he scheduled. Unfortunately, he forgets his watch. He searchs for someone who could give him the time. He sees a zoo keeper standing next to an elephant. ''Excuse me sir,'' says the young man ''do you know what time it is?'' The zoo keeper reaches under the elephant, grabs his balls and starts playing with them. ''Mmmmm, it is about 3:00'' the zoo keeper responds. The young man looks at him in awe, ''How did you know that?'' The zoo keeper looks back at the man, ''I looked at the clock on the wall right behind you.''
  9. Cat, cat, cat, cat, cat Cat, cat, cat, cat, cat, cat, cat I am a kitty
  10. Rakdos

    Jupiter

    I have another ques. bout Jupiter there is methane in the atmosphere ,right, could the carbon crystallize and from a diamond at the core of Jupiter
  11. acrobat reader is freeware but the rest of the acrobat software isnt
  12. Rakdos

    Jupiter

    I read somewhere That Jupiter was a Failed star is this the case
  13. A drunk man goes to the bathroom. A few minutes later the man lets out a scream. A few minutes after that, another loud scream reverberates through the bar. The bartender goes into the bathroom to investigate why the drunk is screaming. "What's all the screaming about in there?" he yells, "You're scaring my customers!" I'm just sitting here on the toilet," slurs the drunk, "and every time I try to flush, something comes up and squeezes the hell out of my privates." With that, the bartender opens the door, looks in and says, "You idiot! You're sitting on the mop bucket!"
  14. I hate coke it is nasty as canine puke did i just say that
  15. Me eating bugles Me watching Nascar hoping Number 8 will win
  16. distillery- brew place of beer metallurgical engineer
  17. i dont mind but its up to blike and sayo and blike is in a hurrcaine right now i think that SFN is the last thing on his mind right now
  18. blike charlie has it are you still alive???
  19. my new avatar i reall kewl dont u think <-----------------
  20. Rakdos

    Cells

    microspheres
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

We have placed cookies on your device to help make this website better. You can adjust your cookie settings, otherwise we'll assume you're okay to continue.