batmanisme

I was just wondering if anyone had some advise at all for me on this subject: My Fiance's older daughter (5) has been hitting her self on the head and banging her head into things and even at times pulling her own hair (sometimes even pulling some out) this has been going on now for a couple years (ever since her younger sister(3) was born ) and we kind of attribute this behavior to almost being jealous of her sister and being mad that she is not the only child any longer (we believe this is the case) and now we just recently found out that she (my fiancee) is pregnant again and it seems like the actions of the oldest have gotten worse. the biggest worry now is that this morning the oldest was saying things like she wants to cut hersalf and things of that nature (is this becasue of the new baby that is comming, or is is something more that we shoulcd be very concerned about?) she (the 5 year old) did make a comment to me the other day about worring about when the new baby does come that her mother is going to love her less, and even though i have tried to reassure her that this could and would never happen it doesnt seem to help. the girls both have been through alot in the last few years (theirt mother jumping from relationship to realitonship until now ) and having many other men in and out of their lives. (she is also in the process of finalizing her divorce (before we could even marry) and think this also may be having an affect on the children cause they see their "dad" very seldom lately since october) i am just very worried that their mother (my fiance) is going to end up losing the baby she is carring due to stress of all of this. is there anything anyone could offer as advise to help the oldest child involved here to understand that she will never loose importance to any of us epesically her mother? i am very worried about both of them, do i have serious reason to be or is this something that will pass? i just dont know what i can do to help anyone of the ones here that i love and dont want to see anyone of them hurt in anyway (self inflicted espically) please anyone that can help me with this i would greatly appriciate any advise cause the oldest gilrs doctor wants her mother to take and admit her into a hospital for this now and i know that, that would seriously hurt both of them cause the child would feel as though she was abandoned and her mother would not be good either as she would both feel as though she had abandoned her daughter and possible resent the new baby if she lets herself believe that it is because of this that her daughter is dong these things, and could even be stressed to the point of loosing the baby. please help me!!!!