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Lyudmilascience

why is plastic surgery frowned upon?

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yea I agree I don't want shallow guys. but i want a guy.

 

Not to change the subject from surgery, but perhaps a change of venue is a more appropriate move. The shallow guys are hanging out in bars and gyms. Have you tried museums and libraries?

 

The guys there are hoping you'll stop by so they can tell you how great you look already.

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Not to change the subject from surgery, but perhaps a change of venue is a more appropriate move. The shallow guys are hanging out in bars and gyms. Have you tried museums and libraries?

 

The guys there are hoping you'll stop by so they can tell you how great you look already.

this still relates to why I want a surgery, self insecurity developed from mens rejections. I do go to the library once in a while not many people there my age, if any. but that is a good idea, I don't go to bars anyway. its hard to meet people in museums I cant keep a conversation going, so far the best places i got to meet men is on public transportation and at our local pool. thank you for the advice. thoes are the places with grate men maybe I need different tactics.

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this still relates to why I want a surgery, self insecurity developed from mens rejections. I do go to the library once in a while not many people there my age, if any. but that is a good idea, I don't go to bars anyway. its hard to meet people in museums I cant keep a conversation going, so far the best places i got to meet men is on public transportation and at our local pool. thank you for the advice. thoes are the places with grate men maybe I need different tactics.

If you want a nerdy man, push harder and be more persistent ; they tend to be shyer. You maybe ignored initially but you may need to persist a few times if you get no reaction at first; no reaction is not necessarily rejection. They may still say no but, hey, that's the way it goes sometimes.

Edited by StringJunky

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I cant keep a conversation going,

 

I think the key to connecting with people is to be yourself (which isn't really a physical, boob-related sort of thing). Nobody is interested in you pretending to be anything other than yourself (unless you're in a play). Many people think they need to "act" a certain way, but if that's not the way you normally are, it will seem unnatural and that's usually what turns people off in initial encounters. I know it sounds like a cliche, but any relationship that has a chance of lasting needs to be honest.

 

I can give you a trick to keep conversations going. Make sure the questions you ask can't be answered with a "yes" or "no". Ask open ended questions, like "What do you think of when you look at this painting?" instead of "Do you like this painting?" This will give you time to listen and learn about this person, give you more opportunities for more questions, as well as opportunities to talk about yourself.

 

One thing I've noticed about folks who have a hard time with conversations. They're unusually worried about making mistakes, or forgetting, or misunderstanding, or falling into an awkward silence because they think they aren't interesting enough. If this is you, it's mostly in your head, for starters, since you certainly are an interesting person when you have the time to write it down. And often these folks are so desperate for things to talk about that they grab onto something said earlier and start forming what they want to say about it, before the other person has finished talking. This can mean they miss something said later that will make their reply sound strange, which is what they were worried about in the first place. Does that make sense? I knew a woman once who's eyes would sort of de-focus as I talked with her, and I could tell that something I said was prompting her to formulate a reply. Everything I said once her eyes unfocused went in one ear and out the other. Once I realized she was doing it, I saw that she did it a LOT. It was frustrating.

 

Don't be afraid of silences. Don't be afraid of not immediately having a great response. In fact, if someone asks you something and you visibly take the time to think about it, you'll probably gain more respect from them. Not all conversation goes as smoothly as it does on scripted TV, so cut yourself a break and know that listening is just as important as talking, maybe more so. And I'm betting you're a very good listener when you're being yourself.

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I know it sounds like a cliche, but any relationship that has a chance of lasting needs to be honest.

Yes, If you don't start with it the end is preordained.

Edited by StringJunky

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Yes, If you don't start with it the end is preordained.

 

One of my best buddies used to think he had to act like James Bond when he dated. He'd pick them up in a sports car, take them to an expensive restaurant, go out dancing, really put on the Ritz.

 

But he's a down-to-earth type that prefers a good BBQ to lobster, and he doesn't have a pretentious bone in his body. The type of women he was looking for could tell something wasn't right. He used to complain to me that he could get first dates, sometimes second dates, but even though he spent a fortune and was impeccably Bond in his behavior, he couldn't find anyone interested in sticking with him.

 

He eventually went through a period where the only dates he went on were with strippers, so he's my source on breast augmentation surgery. The strippers knew the Bond thing was fake, but they didn't care. My buddy grew out of it eventually, and just started letting his warts show. He's happily married now.

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One of my best buddies used to think he had to act like James Bond when he dated. He'd pick them up in a sports car, take them to an expensive restaurant, go out dancing, really put on the Ritz.

 

But he's a down-to-earth type that prefers a good BBQ to lobster, and he doesn't have a pretentious bone in his body. The type of women he was looking for could tell something wasn't right. He used to complain to me that he could get first dates, sometimes second dates, but even though he spent a fortune and was impeccably Bond in his behavior, he couldn't find anyone interested in sticking with him.

 

He eventually went through a period where the only dates he went on were with strippers, so he's my source on breast augmentation surgery. The strippers knew the Bond thing was fake, but they didn't care. My buddy grew out of it eventually, and just started letting his warts show. He's happily married now.

Yes, if you don't start out as you are you will only disappoint later, unless your aim is not a permanent situation then Bond will do fine.

 

 

 

, so he's my source on breast augmentation surgery.

 

:)

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this still relates to why I want a surgery, self insecurity developed from mens rejections. I do go to the library once in a while not many people there my age, if any. but that is a good idea, I don't go to bars anyway. its hard to meet people in museums I cant keep a conversation going, so far the best places i got to meet men is on public transportation and at our local pool. thank you for the advice. thoes are the places with grate men maybe I need different tactics.

 

I can't put myself in your shoes, but for myself - as a guy who is attracted to women - breast size isn't a deal breaker. Actually it's hard for me to imagine myself rejecting someone for that.

 

 

As far as meeting people, online dating is one way to go.

I have tried it myself and found several women which would have made excellent girlfriends.

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As far as meeting people, online dating is one way to go.

 

I have tried it myself and found several women which would have made excellent girlfriends.

That's a different skill that doesn't necessarily translate to a real life face-to-face connection but it can be interesting and a way to practice socialising in a relatively safe and physically disconnected way.

Edited by StringJunky

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yep thanks I am on dating sites. maybe it will work out one day, I just don't like waiting.

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