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The Official JOKES SECTION :)

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12 minutes ago, DrP said:

This true story came to mind earlier for some reason - thought I'd share it as it still makes me chuckle:

Nearly 30 years ago I did work experience in an Analytical lab for quite a big firm that had a research lab, QC lab, Analytical lab and many other facilities. The rather old guy I worked for there was head of the Analytical department and was called Richard Peerless. He was a great old guy and I really respected him, so did everyone else. He was very encouraging to me and to all who worked for him. At the time the Human resource dept were making people were ID badges...   I think they must have been toying with him a little when they put a little too many abbreviations on his badge - he wasn't impressed that it simply said on it:  "Dick P - Anal Chemist".  

This still tickles me now.  

Haha funny but suspicious in the same time DrP. Or should I call you Dr. Peerless!?!

Spoiler

Image result for dramatic chipmunk

 

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1 minute ago, Silvestru said:

Haha funny but suspicious in the same time DrP. Or should I call you Dr. Peerless!?!

  Reveal hidden contents

Image result for dramatic chipmunk

 

lol - you're over thinking it.  Although I have been called 'Dick' before - it is not my name. ;)

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18 hours ago, mistermack said:

Two skunks living down a hole. One called  In, the other called Out.

How did Out know if In was In or Out ? 

(it's not difficult, answer tomorrow if nobody gets it)

Instinct.

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This might come as a surprise but I'm very old. I saw the dead sea when it was still the sick sea.

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4 hours ago, Itoero said:

This might come as a surprise but I'm very old. I saw the dead sea when it was still the sick sea.

That must have been right after the Vitamin Sea dried up.

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On ‎31‎/‎10‎/‎2018 at 8:23 PM, Phi for All said:

That must have been right after the Vitamin Sea dried up.

I don't know. I do have an interesting fast about zebra's.

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On 11/16/2018 at 5:18 PM, Itoero said:

This is not a pipe.

Afbeeldingsresultaat voor this is not a pipe

 

I am afraid this is too profound for this forum.

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1 hour ago, michel123456 said:

I am afraid this is too profound for this forum.

Sometimes a forum is just a forum 

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22 hours ago, michel123456 said:

am afraid this is too profound for this forum

That might be, it's a pro joke.

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4 nuns arrive at the Pearly Gates of Heaven. St. Peter is there to meet them with a bowl of Holy Water.

St. Peter goes up to the first nun and says, "Have you ever touched a penis?"

The first nun responds, "Yes I have. I have touched a penis with the tip of my finger."

St. Peter holds out the bowl and says, "Dip your finger in this Holy Water, and be free to enter the Kingdom of Heaven."

The first nun gladly follows the instruction and proceeds to enter Heaven.

St. Peter goes to the second nun and again asks, "Have you ever touched a penis?"

The second nun replies hesitantly, "Yes. I have touched a penis with my whole hand."

St. Peter smiles and says, "Do not despair, simply dip your whole hand into the Holy Water and enter the Kingdom of Heaven."

The second nun quickly does as she is told and gladly steps forth into Heaven.

At this point the fourth nun cuts in front of the third nun and says, "Listen, I better go next because I'm not gurgling that shit after she sticks her ass in it."

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I couldn't help myself... I made a parody of Trump. Feel free to share! Enjoy!!!
 

 

Edited by Daedalus

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Funny things about Filipinos reading newspapers ads and everything - 

"Wanted Sales Rep"... what the heck, I don't have any idea of selling refs (refrigerators), let me look for another page!

Damn it ... until now "Mr. Immediately is not yet been captured by the law enforcers? It still say here, "Wanted Immediately !"

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I am called a dick a lot. so much, in fact, it became my nickname.

 

 

 

my name is Peter(not really screen name/easter egg but)

Edited by peterwlocke

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I found this somewhere online with the following comment which made me choke on my coffee.

 

982322D8-35EC-4843-8CA9-F62A5328483B.jpeg

 

Math, not even once.

Edited by koti

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1 hour ago, koti said:

I found this somewhere online with the following comment which made me choke on my coffee.

 

982322D8-35EC-4843-8CA9-F62A5328483B.jpeg

 

Math, not even once.

A genuine, eccentric scientist-mathematician.

Edited by StringJunky

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Just now, StringJunky said:

A genuine eccentric scientist mathematician.

He has my outmost respect and I would give a lot to have dinner with him but still the comment made me laugh.

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1 minute ago, koti said:

He has my outmost respect and I would give a lot to have dinner with him but still the comment made me laugh.

For all the the poverty on the outside, he's one of the richest inside...I'm sure he doesn't give 2 F's.

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