Joatmon Posted April 27, 2012 Share Posted April 27, 2012 Some time ago I spoke to someone on the phone who I hadn't seen for many years. We agreed to speak again and I told her of my interest in the forum and how to see what I had posted saying she would get some idea of my present day thoughts and interests. After I put the phone down I thought about this and had doubts about whether I had been wise! I think, because of the general anonymity, I am much less inhibited than I am in my everyday life. I tend to say and do things without hesitation when in contact with forum members. Anything I do or say is genuine in the sense that it is what I am thinking at the time - but often beyond what I would do or say in my everyday life (such as writing, no doubt technically dreadful, poetry). Does this ring any bells with you? If I met you in everyday life might you come across as someone with a different personality to that which you show on the forum? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StringJunky Posted April 27, 2012 Share Posted April 27, 2012 My writing-style probably is more formal than my talking, which contains quite a lot of dialectic stuff and abbreviation common to my area in Lincolnshire UK, so the two styles are at odds with each other. I like to think that my forum persona reflects an honest position but the projected presentation is likely different to my everyday one. In answer to the OP, I would say they are not the same. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zapatos Posted April 27, 2012 Share Posted April 27, 2012 In person I am much more likely to walk away from conflict. I've done it here some too but not nearly as much. If someone starts to get hostile or loud during discussions I'll often just disconnect and move on. Life is too short. The angrier I get, the less you hear from me. What you see of me here is just what I'm like in person. Although in person I am much better looking. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ecoli Posted April 27, 2012 Share Posted April 27, 2012 Most of my writing, even informal notes to friends, is more formal than I speak (and definitely more formal than how other people seem to write). But f- em. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cap'n Refsmmat Posted April 27, 2012 Share Posted April 27, 2012 When I first joined SFN, my posts were essentially stream-of-consciousness. (Hey, don't blame me. I was 12.) They were very much a representation of how I would speak. As I matured, my personality was shaped quite a bit by SFN, I think. I tried to emulate posters like swansont and Sayonara³, since they had the ability to express coherent (and often very powerful) arguments clearly and concisely. No filler phrases or meaningless sentences, no irrelevant points -- just the heart of the argument, expressed precisely. I can't say I approach ordinary conversation this way, but it's been a great help when I prepare presentations. I plan them out the same way I'd plan a detailed post, so I carefully explain my ideas without tangents and without introducing ideas before the audience is ready for them. It's worked very well. In ordinary conversation, however, I make quite a few more puns and irreverent comments. Wisecracks work best when you can time them at just the right moment, and they're less fun on a forum, where you can spend an hour planning the perfect wisecrack response. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ecoli Posted April 27, 2012 Share Posted April 27, 2012 When I first joined SFN, my posts were essentially stream-of-consciousness. (Hey, don't blame me. I was 12.) They were very much a representation of how I would speak. I think that was even a bit before my time here... though I do remember other staff tearing you a new one for how you used to talk! I was 17 when I first joined SFN (!) So at least I could string a few words together. As I matured, my personality was shaped quite a bit by SFN, I think. I tried to emulate posters like swansont and Sayonara³, since they had the ability to express coherent (and often very powerful) arguments clearly and concisely. No filler phrases or meaningless sentences, no irrelevant points -- just the heart of the argument, expressed precisely. Definitely the same here... swansont and YT2095 seemed pretty epic to me then (still do!) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xittenn Posted April 28, 2012 Share Posted April 28, 2012 I'm just as socially awkward and immature in my day to day. The following is an artists composite of the female version of the clown from Stephen King's It: I believe that this closely represents my inner being or soul if you will . . . . I growl when I look in the mirror sometimes! I guess in RL I am far more prone to say things like "When I grow up I'm going to run a Zombie making factory. You wanna be my first subject? You can live forever!" I wouldn't say something like this here Swansont might have things to say about such behaviour. I feel like an evil version of one of the misfit toys from Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer (TV special)! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hypervalent_iodine Posted April 28, 2012 Share Posted April 28, 2012 As with most of the others, I'm much more formal here than I am in my day to day dealings IRL. In fact, my writing is in general more formal than I am in person. Other than that I tend to think I'm true to myself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
michel123456 Posted April 28, 2012 Share Posted April 28, 2012 (1)Your Forum persona. Do you present the real you in the forum? (...) (2)Does this ring any bells with you? (3)If I met you in everyday life might you come across as someone with a different personality to that which you show on the forum? These are 3 different questions. Q(1).Do you present the real you in the forum? A(1) Yes, meaning that I don't tell lies. And No, that's not me, that's the part of me I show very rarely in real life. Q(2)Does this ring any bells with you? A(2)Yes. Q(3)If I met you in everyday life might you come across as someone with a different personality to that which you show on the forum? A(3) I agree completely with hypervalent_iodine's answer. I am more formal because english is not my native language (I also uses this forum to improve my skills) and written language is very different from spoken language. I always re-read myself several times before posting, editing, searching my words. Sometimes I can write a full text and after reading it I say to myself "Rubbish" and throw it away. That doesn't happen in RL. The picture on my profile is me on a good day, you don't want to interfere with me on my bad days, and my avatar is where I live constantly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mississippichem Posted April 28, 2012 Share Posted April 28, 2012 As just about everyone else has pointed out, in real life my speech contains more slang and is less formal. However, I'm still an asshole in real life and even nerdier than my forum persona. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ydoaPs Posted April 28, 2012 Share Posted April 28, 2012 I am a bot that Cap'n Refsmmat wrote; there is no real me. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arete Posted April 28, 2012 Share Posted April 28, 2012 (edited) I'm less likely to doggedly argue a point, and considerably less formal. Edited April 28, 2012 by Arete Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swansont Posted April 28, 2012 Share Posted April 28, 2012 I am somewhat less coherent in real life, because on the forum I can review and edit and spend some time thinking about the best way to say things. IRL there is more time pressure. I prefer written communication anyway (I dislike phones) because I like to be able to review what was said to organize my thoughts. But I do OK verbally, because I've been presented opportunities to learn to think on my feet. My moderator persona here is often a reflection of my navy officer persona — giving orders and getting people to toe the line is a learned behavior for me. It's not how I act in other situations. So you might not have an opportunity to see me act that way very much face-to-face. There's also an issue of comfort level. If I am uncomfortable or out of my depth in a conversation online, I either ignore the thread or just lurk. That kind of avoidance in real life leads to uncomfortable silence. You might not expect me to be the silent type based on sampling my contributions here, but really I'm an introvert. In ordinary conversation, however, I make quite a few more puns and irreverent comments. Wisecracks work best when you can time them at just the right moment, and they're less fun on a forum, where you can spend an hour planning the perfect wisecrack response. Same here, if you can believe it. Not that I don't bring the snark in writing, but I am a font of wiseassitude in casual conversation. I don't think I have ever spent anywhere close to an hour preparing such a remark online; when I do that here it's pretty much off-the-cuff. So in that regard my online persona is the same, but with the gain turned down and a filter in place. All in all I'd say I'm not too different, it's just that being online puts a different emphasis on what parts of my persona get presented. Under the proper conditions, you'd see a similar persona. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joatmon Posted April 28, 2012 Author Share Posted April 28, 2012 As I suspected, I treat my posts rather differently to the majority of you. Most of you seem to present well thought out posts in a formal manner. Most of you seem rather guarded about what you reveal of yourselves. Probably, and I think it has a lot to do with my age, I treat the forum in a much more casual way. I post almost immediately what I am thinking without regard to how much of myself I reveal. In my posts I can be serious, particularly if trying to help a student with a homework problem. However, I spend a lot of time in the lounge where some of my posts can be tongue in cheek or even jocular; these can easily be misunderstood. I think there is a paradox in that forum members, who I don't know, sometimes see more of my innermost thoughts (or soul) than people who really do know me well. BTW swansont must be quite old if he has a 24 year old bot! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ringer Posted April 29, 2012 Share Posted April 29, 2012 Like most of the others my writing is more formal than how I usually talk, but I suppose I'm also nicer on here than I usually am in person. Personally I don't think I'm mean but I do have a tendency to be sarcastic and make jokes that don't get translated well through text so I don't ever write them but would not hesitate to say it in person. Just this week I've been told to not be an @$$hole twice, but I don't think I've ever been called that, or any synonyms, on the forum. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
radioactive cookie Posted April 29, 2012 Share Posted April 29, 2012 My writing isn't way too more formal than how I actually talk. I try to be casual and friendly in writing, but when the time is right and when I'm in the mood, I'll talk a bit more formal. I sometimes tend to be a bit shy in real life and I won't speak up much if I don't feel very comfortable with the people near me. Both in real life and online, I'm a very approachable person. I love to help people out and can make a great listener. I'm empathetic and understanding. I do, however, have a short temper. At times, if I'm not in the mood to try and be friendly (pretty rare), I'll just be an ass. If the time and place are appropriate (like with friends), I am very vulgar both in real life and online, even if I'm not angry. I won't show that side of me though when I'm trying to make a good impression on people I don't know and would like to get to know. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hypervalent_iodine Posted April 29, 2012 Share Posted April 29, 2012 As I suspected, I treat my posts rather differently to the majority of you. Most of you seem to present well thought out posts in a formal manner. Most of you seem rather guarded about what you reveal of yourselves. Probably, and I think it has a lot to do with my age, I treat the forum in a much more casual way. I post almost immediately what I am thinking without regard to how much of myself I reveal. In my posts I can be serious, particularly if trying to help a student with a homework problem. However, I spend a lot of time in the lounge where some of my posts can be tongue in cheek or even jocular; these can easily be misunderstood. I think there is a paradox in that forum members, who I don't know, sometimes see more of my innermost thoughts (or soul) than people who really do know me well. BTW swansont must be quite old if he has a 24 year old bot! I don't know if guarded is completely true, or at least not for me. I'm on IRC fairly regularly and it's rare that I wouldn't ask a question or not be forthcoming to other people there (or even here, for that matter). One quick look at my profile here will tell you a fair bit about where I live, what I do and what I look like. I don't often bring that information into a thread unless it's asked for (I'm often mistaken for being an older male on this forum), but that is not the same as being guarded. On the other end of things, most of my friends know that I use this website and that I'm a staff member here. Schrodinger's hat, for instance, is a friend of mine from uni who joined last year after I asked him for some help for someone in IRC (who later made a thread) wanting to know about a mystery non-Newtonian fluid I'd forgotten the name of. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joatmon Posted April 29, 2012 Author Share Posted April 29, 2012 (edited) I'm a staff member here. Schrodinger's hat, for instance, is a friend of mine from uni who joined last year after I asked him for some help for someone in IRC (who later made a thread) wanting to know about a mystery non-Newtonian fluid I'd forgotten the name of. Nice to know a sense of humour has its place here. The replies to this topic have got me doing a bit of self analysis - me being me I'll probably post it (publish and be damned!). What you see of me here is just what I'm like in person. Although in person I am much better looking. Hi handsome! Make the best use you can of it now - it doesn't last for ever. Edited April 29, 2012 by Joatmon Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
John Posted April 29, 2012 Share Posted April 29, 2012 (edited) I don't post much. When I first joined, I was something like 18, and at that time I was a very quiet person in real life and a bit more outgoing online in general. Since then, I've become somewhat more sociable in real life and less sociable online, so I'm probably about the same here as I am in person in that regard. I will say I try to be a bit more careful with what I post on SFN nowadays, though, probably because I realize that in this community there are many people who know quite a bit more about things than I do (that wasn't necessarily the case ten years ago) while in real life I'm generally regarded as a fairly intelligent and knowledgeable person. Edited April 29, 2012 by John Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joatmon Posted April 29, 2012 Author Share Posted April 29, 2012 I feel inclined to make a small comment. Some people refer to their time away from the forum as "in real life". I consciously avoided this term because anything I spend time on is part of my real life. I guess I see the forum as a kind of hobby/interest thing. It is as real as any other hobby I have had which have been part of my "real life" such as karting, rock climbing, gliding, chess and poker. Like it or not - you are all part of my "real life"! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
doG Posted April 29, 2012 Share Posted April 29, 2012 Like others, my writing is more formal since I am afforded the time to think how I might best phrase my opinions. I'm more casual in real life. My opinions and personality are pretty much the same in real life though. I have debated a preacher on the existence of god in front of his flock when I found myself in a makeshift church by accident. I will argue my point anytime, anywhere. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ajb Posted April 29, 2012 Share Posted April 29, 2012 I try to largely be myself, though via this medium one has the chance to think about things carefully before answering. For example, I have the chance to refresh my mind using a book before making statements. In person, one may have to tell people "I need time to think about that". I would not give too much personal detail here either. Also remember it is harder to remove comments on the internet than say some silly passing remark in person. Certain topics I would just avoid. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
radioactive cookie Posted April 29, 2012 Share Posted April 29, 2012 I will say I try to be a bit more careful with what I post on SFN nowadays, though, probably because I realize that in this community there are many people who know quite a bit more about things than I do (that wasn't necessarily the case ten years ago) while in real life I'm generally regarded as a fairly intelligent and knowledgeable person. I feel the same way. I'm actually 18 right now. While I'm familiar about many different things pertaining to various sciences, I'm not the expert. I'll be continuing chemistry when I go to college though, and will hopefully be one of the experts in that someday. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joatmon Posted May 5, 2012 Author Share Posted May 5, 2012 (edited) Nice to know a sense of humour has its place here. (Ref #17) - Sorry hypervalent_iodine. I thought oobleck was an entirely fictional substance . I didn't realise that a mixture of starch and water with non-newtonian characteristics could be a serious and interesting experimental medium! Edited May 5, 2012 by Joatmon Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hypervalent_iodine Posted May 5, 2012 Share Posted May 5, 2012 Well then, that solves that mystery. No problems Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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