alice Posted April 12, 2006 Share Posted April 12, 2006 I am only curious of what people have to say. What is your opinion about people asking for advice? Does it irritate you? Does it make you happy that people need your help? Why do you think they ask for advice when they know the answer to their question? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mattbimbo Posted April 12, 2006 Share Posted April 12, 2006 Interesting question and I am curious as to what people will write. My feeling is that it is a big world out there; My understanding will always be incomplete. Also it is not a very good strategy to reinvent the wheel too much; If there are people with experience, use it as best you can. Or if you have experience, share it as bet you can but don't give up your day job. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
YT2095 Posted April 12, 2006 Share Posted April 12, 2006 Numbers mine, 1) What is your opinion about people asking for advice? Does it irritate you? 2) Does it make you happy that people need your help? 3) Why do you think they ask for advice when they know the answer to their question? 1] I don`t have an opinion about it' date=' and no it doesn`t irritate me (except where #3 is involved). 2'] it neither makes me happy or anything else. 3] I`ve no idea why someone would do that, it`s wasting time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
5614 Posted April 12, 2006 Share Posted April 12, 2006 1) What is your opinion about people asking for advice? Does it irritate you? 2) Does it make you happy that people need your help? 3) Why do you think they ask for advice when they know the answer to their question? 1) There is nothing wrong with it. 2) It's nice to know they trust me (if what they're sharing is private) and that they care about my opinion and value my point of view or idea(s). 3) Not everyone knows the answer. Many are unsure so hearing a second point of view is useful. Sometimes whilst they know the answer they do not like it so need someone else to support them. Or they could just be trying to annoy you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swansont Posted April 12, 2006 Share Posted April 12, 2006 I think that the people who ask when they already know are just insecure, and are looking for reassurance. Some may be looking for a target for blame if things go wrong, but if you know them well enough for them to ask advice, I'd think you should be able to see that coming. But I don't have a problem with it. I find it much more of a problem that people offer advice unbidden. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phi for All Posted April 12, 2006 Share Posted April 12, 2006 We're social creatures and we learn by example, experimentation and experience. Some experiential learning comes from other people. You shouldn't be irritated when someone asks you for advice, unless you want them to stop coming to you. Why wouldn't you be happy that someone thinks you might have the answer to their problem? Even when someone "thinks" they know the answer it never hurts to check with other people. Insight is exponential when you aks the advice of others. I look at advice as a recommendation. Get all the recommendations you can about a problem and then make the most informed decision you can. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tejaswini Posted April 12, 2006 Share Posted April 12, 2006 when people ask for advice i definetly feel happy ,. if they know the answer and even then ask me for it i 'll think that they are trying to just verify it before they act. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TimbaLanD Posted April 12, 2006 Share Posted April 12, 2006 I guess people ask for advice to evaluate what others have experienced.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
YT2095 Posted April 12, 2006 Share Posted April 12, 2006 also your Title belies your questions. so to answer your Title question, it`s often for any one of a Number of reasons, more often than not it`s because they value that persons expertise and so wish to obtain an Informed answer rather than that of a Pub-Philiosopher, in order to gain information best suited to their problem nothing complicated in most cases I shouldn`t imagine. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gcol Posted April 12, 2006 Share Posted April 12, 2006 When asked for advice on which course of action to take, I am cautious. I have to decide whether they are: 1. Looking for confirmation or support for something they have already decided on. Here you have to listen between the words and interpret the body language, then answer between neutral and enthusiastic to avoid an argument. 2. Asking for a genuine alternative opinion. This should be pleasing, because your honest opinion is obviously valued. This answer requires the most care and thought, because you have some responsibility for their ultimate decision. 3. Asking practical advice based on your own experience how to do something. This is the easy one, you either know or you dont. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dak Posted April 12, 2006 Share Posted April 12, 2006 Usually, i find that the act of asking for advice forses a person to put their problem into words, and thus actually think about it more coherently than they had been up untill that point. Whenever i'm asked for advice, i usually just ask the odd leading question to get the person to describe their problem more, watch them figure out the answre themselves, and then I get given the credit for 'solving' their problem, which i allways find amusing so yeah... 'why do people ask advice?' probably 'cos they know asking for advice works and helps solve problems. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
YT2095 Posted April 12, 2006 Share Posted April 12, 2006 3. Asking practical advice based on your own experience how to do something. This is the easy one, you either know or you dont. yeah, those are the ones I`ll either (or not) respond to 99% of the time, hence I feel Nothing when asked for the other stuff, I can rellate my own personal experience, but am VERY hesitant to actualy give them an answer for such things (too many Unknowns). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alice Posted April 13, 2006 Author Share Posted April 13, 2006 I see. So tell me, how do you tell people to stop asking advice from you? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
YT2095 Posted April 13, 2006 Share Posted April 13, 2006 generaly I don`t. but on the occasions that I have done, I usualy just tell them straight and give my reason(s), it`s never open to debate after that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alice Posted April 13, 2006 Author Share Posted April 13, 2006 That is really helpful, and if they get hurt? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
YT2095 Posted April 13, 2006 Share Posted April 13, 2006 then it`s their own fault for being silly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iglak Posted April 15, 2006 Share Posted April 15, 2006 i find that most times people ask for advice, they're trying to get motivation to act on the situation. it's hard for one person to make a decision, especially one that seems to be either completely unknown to everyone else or goes against what everyone else generally thinks. when i ask for advice, i'm looking to see if there is anyone who came to the same solution/conclusion i did. if no one does, then i think something must be wrong with what i was thinking, so i go back and re-analize the situation to see if i can come up with the same solutions they did. if one person comes to the same conclusion on their own, then i know that at least one person agrees with me. s/he might not openly admit it, but if i act in that way, because i think it's the right thing to do, then i know that i made the right decision, because i'm not going against everyone. at least one person will support me. being the social creatures that we are, i tend to not be able to act purely on my own whims or decisions. i have to know that i'm doing something for someone other than myself, or it becomes somewhat pointless to act. when everyone is indifferent, i tend to be able to make decisions easily, but it's much harder when everyone seems to think against what i want to do, despite whether or not they know why they think that way or whether or not i think they're fundamentally wrong. other instances are, of course, when someone doesn't have any idea how to react to a situation, or could only come up with bad solutions, and is looking for at least a general direction to explore. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sunspot Posted April 18, 2006 Share Posted April 18, 2006 If someone asks for advice, they usually know what they what but they may also be aware of alternatives and may not know how to cover all the contingencies. One can not alway depend on what one's heart desires, so one tries to create a meeting of the minds to get the intellect involved. Usually my strategy is to figure out what the person wants and then brain storm all the pro's and con's. It doesn't answer the question but makes them better able to weigh the options. If it is something trivial, like the color to paint the house, I will tell them to trust their first intuition and then I attempt to make them feel good about their choice by showing all the brights spots I can think of. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thief75 Posted April 18, 2006 Share Posted April 18, 2006 I think people already know what they are going to do when they ask for advice, they are really just looking for affirmation or an option they had not considered. I think some are just looking for pity because it is a lonely world out there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alice Posted April 18, 2006 Author Share Posted April 18, 2006 It could also be that they are just seeking attention. Or they need to express the feelings that they hold in their hearts to lighten the burden of having to carry such emotions. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Genecks Posted April 22, 2006 Share Posted April 22, 2006 What is your opinion about people asking for advice? To increase intellect for obtainment of power. Does it irritate you? Yes; makes me have to ask for advice. Does it make you happy that people need your help? I don't really care about people. I do get annoyed by super noobs that want to know how to use a computer. They could learn how to type on their own time. Why do you think they ask for advice when they know the answer to their question? Do they know the answer? Does anyone ever know? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xDiViNiTix Posted April 22, 2006 Share Posted April 22, 2006 i guess to just help back up their thoughts on something... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alice Posted April 25, 2006 Author Share Posted April 25, 2006 Thank you for all your responses. It has helped me a lot. I guess I should just accept the fact that we are still noobs when it comes to life. We do not know the exact things that we will encounter, and when it comes to face you...you don't know what to say...maybe out of shock, you're mind turns blank...or full of answers that you become confused of which one to choose...so you ask for advice. from people whom you know can help you a great deal because they have been in the same situation. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
why? Posted April 25, 2006 Share Posted April 25, 2006 I am only curious of what people have to say. What is your opinion about people asking for advice? Does it irritate you? Does it make you happy that people need your help? Why do you think they ask for advice when they know the answer to their question? Everyone needs help. And thats what they want when they ask for advice. It doesnt irritate me at all but it kinda makes me feel good and proud of myself for 2 reasons. 1) I could help someone. 2)(the more selfish reason) I feel proud of myself that they came to me for advice. Makes me feel superior. (im going to hell arent I? ) They ask for advice when they know the answer because sometimes they just want a conversation starter or they just wanna check or they just like bugging you. I do that a lot of times. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alice Posted April 25, 2006 Author Share Posted April 25, 2006 They ask for advice when they know the answer because sometimes they just want a conversation starter or they just wanna check or they just like bugging you. I do that a lot of times. I do that a lot too. Just to annoy people...or just to say something...it's not that I don't like silence...sometimes it's nice to talk about something you don't want to talk about...later on in the conversation, you'll get to something interesting anyway. But usually I slap myself because I ask advice for the silliest things...or the things I shouldn't ask advice for...like a secret that i should just keep to myself...so I usually just shut up and keep the questions to myself...i hate issues...people make issues of my asking for advice...so i shut up and pretend i don't have any problem at all. People ask advice from me...a lot...so it makes me happy to help them...but it irritates me when they ask over and over again...it's like they didn't learn anything from what i said...or from the shows they watch on tv...the books they read...the things they hear from people. so i guess some of them want to bug me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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