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Guys Love Tubesocks


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JohnB,

Does this mean our wire coathangers will get smaller?

Not exactly. In our universe, clothes dryers are constantly eating our socks and sending them a parallel universe. In the parallel universe, its completely normal for lone socks to suddenly show up, but for some reason their coathangers disappear from their closets and wind up in ours.

 

I dont know why people say this (IM)M-theory stuff is hard to get, I understand it perfectly well.

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Am I the only one who finds a thread about tube socks lasting more than one page strange?

It's still on page 1 for me. Then again, I have my "Posts per page" setting set to 100 since I'd rather scroll than click.....

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What are Birkenstocks? Tried googling' date=' always directed to e-bay for bargains in the mysterious objects.

 

Or are they some sort of germanic torture apparel, like lederhosen but worse?[/quote']

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Birkenstocks

 

The brand has become associated with lesbians, hippies and especially neo-hippies on the one side, but (especially in Germany and Austria) also with housewives on the other side.

 

Interesting indeed...

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The last time I got my guy new socks he slipped in the kitchen
His old socks must have been pretty disgusting. Why do socks have more friction once you've washed them a few times? Soap?
I definitely prefer Birkenstocks to socks
You'll do well in your new home. It's like Birk capital of the world.
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Not exactly. In our universe, clothes dryers are constantly eating our socks and sending them a parallel universe. In the parallel universe, its completely normal for lone socks to suddenly show up, but for some reason their coathangers disappear from their closets and wind up in ours.
Ah yes, I once subscribed to that theory too. Then I learnt the unpalatable truth.

 

Socks are the immature form of wire coathangers.

 

The metamorphosis requires a dark, wet environment to occur, so it usually happens in washing machines. (The transformation has been known to happen in gym lockers too and it is reported that a strong, pungent odour is left behind when it does.)

 

Most of the fully adult wire coathangers then migrate to a dry, dark environment and play no further part in the breeding cycle. Some will move to a shady, dry area (Like the clothesline under the house) where they will intertwine and breed. This juvenile form (Sockus Babius Coathangerii) then attaches itself to the clothesline using a Pseudopodic Ectoplasmic Ganglion, thus imitating the behaviour of the other juveniles. (You were sure you took all the washing off the line weren't you? But the next morning, down at the far end of the line, near the wirecoathangers, is one lone sock. Now you know how it got there.)

 

I have been investigating the possibility of domesticating these wild coathangers to produce socks for the benefit of mankind. I communicated my theory to the Australian Government but struck the brick wall of indifference. (Or so I thought at the time.)

 

Where does the energy come from for this breeding? I'm glad you asked. We provide it through the medium of radio and TV. Everyone knows that wire coathangers are perfectly useful as radio and TV antenna, they absorb the energy and use it for breeding purposes. The proof of this is that the number of wire coathangers has increased in direct proportion to the amount of radio and TV tranmissions. This sorry fact will be our undoing.

 

Those who migrate to the cupboard are also recieving the energy, but as they don't breed, it has no outlet. They have learnt about us from our radio and TV shows. They are full of energy and they are frustrated. And they are planning our demise.

 

One day, when they are ready, we will open the cupboard and be hit right between the eyes with 20 years worth of "Days of Our Lives" and "Gilligan's Island" reruns. If this fails to destroy us they will use their deadliest weapons, "Neighbours" and "Home and Away."

 

When I realised the danger, I again communicated with the Australian Government. This time they told me not to contact them again on this topic. (In fact, they told me not to tell anyone at all and there were hints of nasty things happening to me if I did. I smell a conspiracy.) But I persevered.

 

Shortly after my 256th phone call some government agents arrived at my house with the rediculous cover story that they were Door to Door Coat Salesmen. But no coat salesman would have such poor stock. The arms were far too long and all the buckles were at the back. How dumb do they think I am?

 

For now, it's late and I fear I'm rambling so it's off to bed. That's three of the blue pills, four of the red ones and two of the yellow ones. Or was that three of the yellow ones.........

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I'm sure the sock black hole is spewing it's contents into my bedroom. I seem to have double the socks I had, say a few months ago...and I have absolutely no idea where they came from. I can't even remember the last pair I bought.

 

I found a spring roll in one last Sunday...strange things are a foot in the Snail bedroom.

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Everytime I have to give someone a gift' date=' and that someone is a guy, I get him tubesocks. I dont know why it works, but guys just LOVE tubesocks.

 

They dont like any other kinds of socks. Not crewcut, not anklecut, and definitely not the no-show socks. Only tubesocks. They love tubesocks almost as much as boxer shorts.

 

I think I can explain it, probably having something to do with evolution. A long time ago, when our ancestors were coming down from the trees, they must have discovered a population of tube socks out on the open plains. So, to protect the tube socks from killing each other off (they are naturally cannibalistic), men started putting them on their feet which felt good to them. And so began the longlasting symbiotic relationship between men and their tubesocks.

 

There is no way that mens love for tubesocks cant be just part of the natural order of the universe, because I've given a lot of men tubesocks and unanimously they've said "oh my god I love you, thank you IMM, how did you know!". Its almost supernatural.

 

:)[/quote']

Anything that comes out of a sealed plastic bag (shinny helps) is actually quite exciting for most of us :P

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