Joshua201

This right here

quick questions.1. what is "swag"?2. is it relative?3. does dual booting my phone give me "swag"?4. does running a hackintosh with 4 other operating systems on a PC give me "swag"?....social laws are stupid

Pregnant women can do anything and get away with it. Rob a bank and blame it on the baby's kicking

The only man who sees "hot" as warm - Envoy

Just the perfect time to fall sick

The guy in charge of the soundtrack in this movie should be shot -_____-

HOW TO START A FIGHT:1. Ask ur partner for one fried egg and one boiled egg.2. When she brings the plate, throw it down and shout, ''you boiled the wrong egg!"

I've refused to follow social conventions. That doesn't make me a rebel

See me watching African magic. That's how bad things have gotten

Things 72 hours without sleep can do to you -_____-

3rd successive night. Andy what have you done o?

48 sleepless hours. ... Not bad at all

Insomnia - I wonder what could be behind it.Still up at 5am

"There's one wolf in Alaska, how do you find it?First build a fence down the middle of the state, wait for the wolf to howl, determine which side of the fence it is on.Repeat process on that side only, until you get to the point where you can see the wolf." - "wolf-fence" algorithm

- .... .. ... / .. ... / .- .-- . ... --- -- .

If you say "EPL's officiating is poor", i think you do have a case, because...Weeks back Everton vs Newcastle saw 2 good goals from Everton (Anichebe & Fallani) disallowed. (it may have seemed the English FA hated Everton)Buh today Liverpool vs Everton, liverpool's Suarez was denied a good goal cos of poor officiating.Weeks back Chelsea Vs Reading, Chelsea's Torres scored from Offside, yet the goal was given (It seemed Chelsea had bought the FA). A game Chelsea went ahead to win.Yeste...

That feeling when you don't know how to continue a conversation with someone you really like & you just sound really boring.

That mini heart attack you get when you're half asleep and you suddenly feel like you're falling.

That awkward moment when you don't know how to reply to a really sweet text.

NEW JOB TITLES:*Gardener: Landscape Executive Officer (LEO)*House Maid : House Upkeep Manager (HUM)*Receptionist : Office Access Control Manager(OACM)*Typist : Printed Document Handler (PDH)*Messenger : BusinessCommunications Conveyor Specialist (BCCS)*Window Cleaner : Transparent Wall Technician (TWT)*Temporary Teacher : Associate Tutor (AT)*Tea Boy : Refreshment Specialist (RS)*Garbage Collector : Public Sanitation Engineer (PSE)*Watchman : Theft Prevention &Surveillance Officer...

If I got paid for procrastinating, I would be richer than Bill Gates.

A fellow stopped at a rural gas station and, after filling his tank, he paid the bill and bought a soft drink. He stood by his car to drink his cola and he watched a couple of men working along the roadside. One man would dig a hole two or three feet deep and then move on. The other man came along behind and filled in the hole. While one was digging a new hole, the other was about 25feet behind filling in the old. The men worked right past the fellow with the soft drink and went on down the r...

That awkward moment when someone waves at you and you wave back and then realize they're waving to the person behind you..

tired

Patient: How much to have this tooth pulled?Dentist: $100.00.Patient: $100.00 for just a few minutes work?Dentist: Well, I can extract it very slowly if you like.