mike90

Well i was gonna post some more advice, but i dont think i could say it any better then she did. The only thing i can add is however much of a reject you feel like, people do like you man. I know a friendship over the net isnt the same as a " real" one. But for what its worth i like you herme, and if you need someone to talk to you can pm me anytime. Dont sell yourself so short, you seem like a pretty decent guy. Trust me when i tell you a large part of how lost you feel is a part of the age your at, and with any luck it gets better over time. Just dont stop trying ok?

Yeah i was just wondering that myself the other day. Anyone know how shes doing?

Well as far as I've seen so far no two peoples empathy is really the same. Bettina's is pretty different then mine. I have several empathicx friends and we are all very different. I too have gone through the numbness and its most likely some sort of self defense mechanism although i think it just delays dealing with it, learning to handle it. I also lost most of my friends when i was going through this. After a while you learn to suppress it around most people , as they won't understand it. Work on the anger thing. I have the same problem but over the years im gradually getting better at keeping calm. If you need to talk to smeone who understands feel free to post to here or pm me if you like. I know what its like to feel alone with this.

Well see this ones a ghost town now. If you see this i was kinda wonderin how your doing bettina. I myself am lots better and hope your doing well also. I think I'm finally on the road to making peace with myself and being like this. Although i have experienced some strange things lately and was wondering if you had had anything odd happen to you lately? I would describe what i saw in here but im quite tired of being called a nut lol, or at least having it implied. I'd pm you, but to be honest im not quite sure how to lol.

You sound a lot like me when i was your age herme, and i hate to tell you but your aiming for a bruising with the way your living right now. A large part of your attachment with this girl is probably because shes the only friend you have. And you said earlier you didn't understand how finding that relationship your seeking might hurt you, so I'm gonna offer up a little of my story as a cautionary tale. When i was about 20 i fell hard for a girl i worked with. Like you i just thought there was something special about her that made her better then all the other girls. in retrospect a lot of it was probably just that she was the first girl to pay me a lot of attention. I actually got my girl but she was a trainwreck, which everyone could see but me because i had her , and women in general, on such a pedestal. We lasted about 4 years, which was really 3 more then we should have. But i held on a lot longer then i should have, because i beileved that this girl was my one and only chance at happiness. She just wasn't right for me at all but i couldn't see that. All i could see was she wanted me. Long story short she eventually left me and broke my heart. And to make matters worse since i invested everything in just being with this girl I didn't learn how to be more social or make friends while i was with her. So when she left me i felt like i had nothing. i'm not saying this'll happen to you, but your on the wrong track looking for some perfect person to complete you. You have to take steps yourself to make your own life better before your any good for anyone else. More then you need a girlfriend I'd say you need to get out there and socialize in general more. Maybe then you could get rid of this dirt poor opinion you obviously have of yourself, even though your obviously a nice guy. If this girls not into you you have to just MOVE ON. It may take time but eventually you'll find the girl thats right for you. Maybe next time a girl asks you out you should try it out. Like everyone else has said theres really no harm to come for it, and it would probably do you a lot of good. just dont go looking for a soulmate at 18.

Well herme you sound like me not that long ago. I pretty much grew up as a loner and its a depressing way to live. If you are unhappy with a situation it will never change if you just sit there. You'll have to learn to open up to people a little but more or your going to find life very depressing trust me. And to six, theres a lot of nastiness in the world. But if you let what everyone ELSE is doing and saying affect how you view the world you'll only be hurting yourself. No matter how jaded you may feel if your active in your life and stay patient your bound to find both interesting people to talk to and things to do. Theres no limit to the potential we have on this world, it's all in what we choose to do with it. I recently realized there were a lot of negative influences in my life that always made me see the worst in everything, so i removed those influences from my life. For me that meant cutting out tv, most radio, drinking, and a lot of other little things. If your in a situation thats making you feel bored or unhappy with your life, you just have to find a way to change that situation. I'ts all relative =)

Well in my opinion ( ha cant get me NOW) almost all popular music is mindless and very similar sounding. I would have to single out rap as the genre with the most persistent negative messages in its music however. I'ts hard to find any rapper that has had a lot of mainstream success rapping about anything but ho's, their excess of bling, who they just shot, etc. However i don't hear enough people talking about how horrible most mainstream music is these days. I'm a big rock fan but lately I've heard some of the most disgusting lyrics since i started listening to the radio again. A song i hear at least once a day in my car seems to have no lyrics other then how the singers girlfriend is a : crazy bi***, he loves it when shes on top of his ****, and he loves the way she f**** him. I find this song so offensive i always change the station, and a lot of times its playing on the other rock station i listen to at the SAME TIME. thus leading me to beileve this is a very popular song atm. Instead of being angry at the record companies for giving the people what they want, maybe we should just be ashamed that people want to listen to crap like that at all. Without the demand crap music wouldnt exist

Anyone with half a brain can predict the effect a few drinks will have on them. Whereas with drugs it doesnt matter how experienced you are with them or how careful you try to be, as the effects it will have on you vary from person to person and even from one experience to the next. Also when i buy say a case of Miller i know what it is im getting. Whereas with any hard drugs no matter how reliable you think your dealer is you still run a risk of getting stuff that is laced with god knows what or is far more pure or impure then you think it is. Even if you do get good quality stuff your still in potential danger of having it interact with your body in unexpected ways and perhaps giving yourself a heart attack or seizure. The mountain is a more or less predictable challenge as you can prepare yourself for what your getting into, wheareas with drugs its pretty much a coin toss every time

Well as someone thats experimented with drugs I'll tell you theres a bit of a difference between being high and being drunk. No matter how drunk I've ever gotten I still knew who i was and where i was. Whereas I've been under the effects of drugs before and have ended up in a state where I didn't know who or what or where i was, and if not for having my friends there to look out for me i probably would have wandered into traffic =P. Also a reasonably intelligent person drinking in moderation ( personal judgement being key here) will probably be ok. Whereas even a "cautious" drug user runs the risk of an overdose. Also since drugs unpredictably skew your sense of reality you risk endangering yourself or others imo more so then with alcohol. A drunk knows that the guy sitting in the corner is just that. The person having a bad trip can easily confuse that person with anything you could possibly think of

Off topic here but first to azure: hey I AM a socially akward asthmatic whatcha tryin to say! and to demosthenes i just got the postal service cd and they are awesome. Oh and im still for the sterilization thing. Does anyone NEED to have more then 3 children? Seriously

I almost wish they would just pass a law where if once you have say 2 or 3 kids they just have you sterilized. Prolly sounds a little 1984 ish to some people but its starting to get out of hand. If people had just a little more common sense and didn't take family planning lessons from watching the Waltons we would be alright.

Ok, now i am all for changing America's ridiculous drug laws but some things SHOULD be kept out of peoples hands. It's all well and good that theres a guy out there that takes LSD and has all these wonderful insights. There are also people that take it and think they're Superman and go jump off a building. And no im not trying to be dramatic, i actually know someone that had their best friend do just that. I have to agree with aj47 that i really would not want to live in a world where hard drugs are readily available.

Simply hilarious. Except for the not washing part. That is just nasty

Bill Nye came to some sort of science demonstration at my grade school, and i got dragged to an autograph signing by some soap oprea guy by my mom when i was younger. Although i didn't really "meet" them i did get to see NIN from about 5 feet away when they came to seattle last time, which is definately my favorite "celebrity sighting" of the lot

After a short stint on anitdepressants some years ago i pay a lot more attention to listed side effects on medications now. The doctors really played down the potential side effects of the medication, and i ended up having some pretty unpleasant ones. Unfortunately a lot of times it seems like doctors are a little eager to push drugs on someone as an instant cure for whatever ailment they have without considering any other options

When I read i generally "hear" what im reading in sort of a neutral voice. It's without any accent and although it doesn't sound like my speaking voice i tend to identify it as my voice rather then having seperate voices for diferent characters and etc.

I've lost about 30 pounds in the last few months as i dont get hungry when im depressed. I am having a hard time sleeping, with a lot of awful dreams. I'm also starting to have panic attacks again, and my overall health seems to be declining a bit, most likely since im not eating. I'm coming to a point where it seems like its more then i can handle on my own. But ive been on antidepressants before, and they made me worse. I don't make a lot of money and don't have any health care, so im kind of screwed as far as seeing a doctor, and a bit jaded towards them anyway. if anyone has any suggestions of practical things i could do to help ease the depression somewhat, please let me know

Well as far as wether or not someone would want to get rid of their empathy.. in my case yes, a lot of the time. its a major contributing factor in making my life a living hell. Largely because with the empathy comes an increased sensitivity that makes it easy for me to get hurt. Im currently in really bad shape again, and im getting scared that im headed for another serious mental breakdown. Hell i guess I'm pretty much already there. Feel like im falling apart a lot of the time, and i honestly don't know where to go for help.Anyone know any good web sites or anything to deal with depression/suicide? This is not a ploy for attention or anything. I've been suicidal before and already been through several attempts in my life, and i dont wan't to go there again, but sometimes the pain is just unbearable

jesus isn't this flame wars a bit excessive? Bury the hatchet already

Still [lay mtg with my roommate now and then. I have way too many cards laying around lol. Havent tried the online, I heard it was a ripoff. How do you like it so far?

I cant see how anyone can defend denying a large quantity of people basic civil rights because of their sexual orientation. Why SHOULD'NT they have the same rights as anyone else. Only reason this is still up for debate in america is because of all the power the church has over government and society even in the modern age

I don't see why your working the slippery slope argument into this. These are people that rape children. This is proven to be very emotionally damaging to them. These abusers oftentimes reoffend. So what are we supposed to do. You either have to kill them, keep them locked up, or monitor them when they are let out of jail. Monitoring them is supposedly the leser of evils here. Would you prefer they be kept locked up? I don't see how we can just leave criminals that are likely to reoffend with no oversight, no controls on their behavior. They are obviously incapable of controlling their own behavior. When you commit a crime losing some of your freedoms because of it is your respsonsibility, not anyone elses. Maybe if they dont wan't to be monitored they shouldn't have abused children

How are you giving up your freedom? Am i missing something here? So your saying people shouldn't hate people that rape small children? I'm really not trying to put words in your mouth, but that's how its coming across. Of course people have an active disdain for those that hurt others. Expecting people not to be angered by an issue like this doesn't seem reasonable. What is wrong with keeping people likely to continue to commit extremely damaging crimes monitored? Im more concerned about the rights of little children not to be abused then the right of their abusers to have total freedom.

I dont understand how anyone could agree that little kids having sex with adults is ok. Maybe you need to meet some people that have been sexually abused and ask how damaging they feel it has been?

Well this isn't my thread, but like i mentioned before it is nice to have some place to discuss things like this with intelligent, grounded people. ( people that don't claim to be able to levitate or use pyrokenesis, etc) I think it would be kind of a shame to see it go, but maybe i to will have to find somewhere more appropriate to go to talk about this. And to demosthenes idea, its a good one but theres a few problems. Oftentime whats going on has no visible effect except to the people sharing the bond. And many peoples empathy( like mine) is totally random, so its not reliable enough to scientifically prove