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Existential Boredom


TheGeckomancer

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I am not going to commit suicide. This is not a plea for help. Please stay on topic for the question I am asking. I already know life is meaningless, and when I was younger I used to suffer from "dark" depressions where the thought of living was unbearable. I got older, learned a lot about Buddhism, and Stoicism, and they helped give me a lot of perspective. It took me a long time to come to accept how inherently bad the world is, and not want to just fall apart under the thought. Now, I can deal with the thought of getting up every single day without anything in my life improving (which is saying a lot because I have literally nothing I care about), and still get up everyday without it bothering me. But this has brought in a new thought. Why should I? Not, whats the point, I know there isn't one. I am not living for anyone else, no one would care at all if I died, but that isn't what I am talking about either. Instead of it being this "unbearable" thought, of how empty and meaningless everything is. Now I just have this long mental sigh. I bought the ticket and got on the ride, I am not going to jump off half way, mostly because I committed myself to never taking that way out when I was younger. My commitment will hold true but I don't know why I should besides that? I have seen what life has to offer and I am not impressed or interested. In anything. Does anyone else feel this way and what do you do to cope with the boredom? I legitimately wake up everyday and hope something will happen to either kill me, or at least make life more interesting. I don't even care if it was a terrorist attack. I have lived through pain, and fear, and uncertainty of whether or not I would live, and I can honestly say all of them are preferable to boredom.

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Yeah, i think it's a reasonably common feeling, at least in my experience. I guess you've already come across the existentialist philosophers: as Albert Camus said, "To decide whether life is worth living is to answer the fundamental question of philosophy

 

Existence isn't inherently meaningless or meaningful: it just is. If you want meaning in your life, create it. In the myth of Sisyphus we can imagine him happy.

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Something just "being" is an example of meaninglessness, as it lacks inherent meaning. I am not trying to imply that a life with inherent meaning is less boring, I don't think it would be. And yes I have checked out Albert Camus, it's a pretty interesting take, but I can't really embrace absurdism. I think there may be some variant of that idea that would resonate with me, but it wouldn't be a humorous one.

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Since even a tiny portion of a single aspect of almost any perspective of the planet is of remarkable interest to me I am unable to appreciate the situation you find yourself in. As such, I cannot answer your question, since I cannot imagine being bored when living amid the most amazing environment.

 

I do have a counter question. Why do you find it boring?

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I would say that "just being" is neither meaningless or meaningful. A universe with only rocks in wouldn't be meaningful or meaningless: it takes sentience to imbue existence with either of those properties. But I take your point, the universe does not seem to exist for any particular.

 

I can only tell you how i walked through a similar path: the trick was to keep breathing in the hope something would change, until finally i created some meaning to my life by finding some passions.

 

I wonder how much ennui is due to shifting away from religious views: where once man had a given purpose with a goal in sight (heaven), now some people feel cut adrift from the existence.

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Oh I cut away from religion over a decade ago, and that wasn't too hard. Ophiolite, it's kind of complicated to explain if you haven't experienced it. I find the world interesting, I have tons of questions, and it's these things that keep me distracted from my overall sense of boredom. People are predictable and boring, I find I literally cannot associate with anyone, even my closest friends are not at all like me. I am not at all trying to say I am superior and watching lesser humans from on high because some people know me and can predict me very well too, I am also predictable and boring, that's part of it. Life, is predictable and boring, knowing the general scheme politics WILL take, knowing how each day at your job WILL be, etc. Maybe I spend too much time thinking, but everything is way too predictable, and simple, and boring. Not the natural world, not science, but day to day life and my interactions with everyone. This is actually a weird meta, I am turning this exact feeling I am having into one of my curiosities about the world.

 

Rereading my initial post. The "long mental sigh". I have met a lot of people when I was younger. A child, looking at adults, and wondering what the hell happened to them, or if they were just dead inside, or if I only saw part of them. Is this the nihilism that led into nietzche's works? I am trying to speed along my mental progression past all of this stuff. I have read the works, why does it take time to experience?

Edited by TheGeckomancer
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Do you have any hobbies? Golf is very enjoyable and very addictive. There must be things you enjoy doing? Maybe they can give you some meaning? Sex, love, joy, games, entertainment, fantasy.... the numinous you get when you see an amazing sunset, animal, tree, landscape or canny mathematical equation.. (numinous as in the feeling, not an actual belief in something bigger).

 

Maybe you just need to eat more bananas! They are rich in potassium and are supposed to make you happy. ;-)

 

Anyway - good luck in finding your purpose or joy. I hope it works out.... maybe good works for others less fortunate might give you a sense of achievement and joy, it works for some.

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In the spirit of contribution (the question may be unanswerable) does the observation that we can have it too easy hold any water?

 

Also is it possible that we can all adopt our own rigid way of viewing the world when very young and the needle can get stuck because it seems to work but only minimally well?

 

I remember telling myself a long time ago that it was sufficient to do no harm. I realise that this is a dangerously deficient approach but it seems to "work" for me and obviously I just have it too easy - nothing forces me to change.

 

I think that is the lesson that applies to me personally : you only get out of life in proportion to what you put in (but that may not apply to other people in other situations).

Edited by geordief
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I am going to assume that is short for Dr. Pepper. And yes, it does make the world taste better. I have tons of hobbies, I am a skilled and ranked magic player, I am a certified computer technician, I play league of legends, hearthstone, team fortress 2, starcraft 2, overwatch (when it was in beta for 2 days), and many others. No on the relationship stuff, as I told you, I literally cannot relate to anyone. I am not a virgin, I have had girlfriends, but it's just like the games, or science, or my random curiosities, just distractions to keep my mind off the issue.

 

geordief, I do not understand most of your post.

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Purpose and meaning in life are whatever we chose to assign. Some might say that the purpose of plants is to provide oxygen for us humans? As humans we often prescribe the purpose of things as relating back to ourselves. In religion it is taken a step further and the whole world is said to exist for us, created for us, belonging to us. Ultimately we will all die and all concept of purpose, boredom, and self will be gone. How does knowledge of our end impact meaning? If we were immortal would it actually change anything? Would being immortal add purpose to your life that you can not currently have with a looming expiration date? I think the answer to every question I have asked is "not really and not much". I live because I was born. It is that simple. Living is something that is done. It requires doing. It isn't always fun but so long as you live you must keep living.

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If you don't understand some of my post then either I have badly explained it or it has no strong relevance to your life, I guess.

It made perfect sense to me, so I think the disconnect is for Gecko.

 

Geckomancer, from what you have said, you are likely aware that you can "decide" to have certain attitudes/emotions. Have you ever tried deciding to be happy and fulfilled. If not, why not?

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I see sentience as the active thinking component of the universe, and with that comes a certain responsibility to ourselves, our planet, and the cosmos, to be be on the correct path to comprehension of the elements of reality. In short, we are the cosmos in the process of self-analysis, doing our bit as individuals, as has been done since we grew the brains big enough to entertain advanced curiosities. Existential depression is one of the many fires we must walk through, just as our animal ancestors endured the rigors of competitive evolution to give us these big brains, it seems to come with the territory........Merry christmas geko ps...any thinking of my A through Z minus M thing? pretty funny, huh?

Edited by hoola
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It made perfect sense to me, so I think the disconnect is for Gecko.

 

Geckomancer, from what you have said, you are likely aware that you can "decide" to have certain attitudes/emotions. Have you ever tried deciding to be happy and fulfilled. If not, why not?

 

 

Indeed, for some it’s so much easier to decide what to dislike rather than seeking what to like.

 

Think of the cup as neither half empty nor half full but rather the cup is always full, the only difference is how you comprehend liquid and gas.

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Whats more a part of you?

 

your arm or the air around you?

 

Most would say the arm obviously, as it is part of you, but you can survive without your arm, your cant survive without air.

 

Your suffocating yourself through your own thinking.

 

Get rid of the arm and find some decent oxygen.....

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I stagger into the night, blindly pursued by what is wrong with me, crippled with what is right with me... / god is a purring kitten, so it can't be bothered as we, on the technical questions...

 

 

That makes as much sense as "I'm so blue I'm greener than purple"

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It made sense to me. Sometimes you have to fill in the gaps yourself.

 

It reminds me of what a friend said to me. He said that he had met lots of people who had no problems on the surface but were making their own problems under their own steam.

 

I never met his friends but have always assumed since that that is what we all do.

 

I don't want to dismiss those with genuine problems.

 

I try to keep in mind the admonition to accept that which we cannot change but not to accept that which we can change.

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In the classical case, I think the proportion of making sense/not making sense from one person to the next on non-trivial matters is a "function of the square of the distance" from the world one has experienced, to another's. In a quantum sense it is the degree of psychological entanglement and distance doesn't matter..(instant karma)


dimreeper...filling the gaps doesn't lose understanding, it adds to it in many ways, sometimes improving it...

Edited by hoola
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I legitimately wake up everyday and hope something will happen to either kill me, or at least make life more interesting. I don't even care if it was a terrorist attack.

I'm curious as to what concept or meaning you were attempting to convey by your use of the word "legitimately" in that sentence. Are you suggesting that it can be legitimate to be indifferent as to whether or not yourself or others are the victims of a terrorist attack?

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TheGeckomancer;

 

You have received some very good responses in this thread, but they do not seem to be resonating with your thinking. What if we try a different approach? I tend to analyze things, so consider the following:

 

Having raised and worked with a lot of kids and teenagers, teenagers being perpetually bored, I have had considerable reason to analyze boredom. What I found at the root of boredom was, "I want to be, but can't.", "I want to do, but can't.", "I want to go, but can't.", etc. No matter what the supposed cause was for the boredom, the common factor was always "I". So the solution was to get them thinking about someone else's feelings, wants, or needs. It was not always easy, but it was always successful in dissolving the boredom.

 

After reviewing your posts, it is clear that you have a problem connecting to other people's feelings, wants, and needs, so it is not surprising that you constantly deal with boredom. Connecting to other people, or even other life, on an intimate level requires emotion.

 

When you looked into Buddhism and Stoicism, you were probably trying to find answers to your problems, but these disciplines work specifically to control, limit, regulate, or stifle emotion. So instead of find a solution to your problem, you were actually finding a justification of your problem. It does not surprise me to learn that you broke with your prior religion. Religion is the discipline that studies emotion; and although some religions regulate emotion, other religions celebrate emotion.

 

So the problem with boredom is a problem with emotion. Are purpose and meaning also related to emotion? Yes. A rock has no purpose that it knows of, it has no meaning that it knows of -- a rock has no feeling or emotion -- only sentient beings can experience purpose and meaning, because only sentient beings have feelings and emotions. We are a social specie and require an emotional connection to other life in order to experience contentment and happiness. Consider that even zoos have learned that social species need to have an environment that acquiesces to their social needs, or we end up with depressed, neurotic, and unstable animals.

 

We know that emotion works through chemistry in the brain, so it is possible that medicine can provide you with a solution, but it is also possible that this is a mind set that you have acquired and reinforced through misguided thinking. Whatever the cause, the reality is that you are going to be bored and find little meaning in life unless you can learn to connect to other life in an intimate way. What about a cute little puppy?

 

I wish you luck in your endeavors to resolve this problem.

 

Gee

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In the classical case, I think the proportion of making sense/not making sense from one person to the next on non-trivial matters is a "function of the square of the distance" from the world one has experienced, to another's.

 

 

That only makes sense if you live on a different planet and are trying to send messages between the two.

In which case, the gaps are unimaginably vast as too the understanding.

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