[Gardon Thomas]

HPV

Years back, I contracted an HPV from my dog.

using peanut butter I coaxed the dog into licking my penis until ejaculation, and have had an HPV ever since.


HOW IS THIS NOT COMMON KNOWLEDGE.

HPV's are very common, and this is probably directly influenced by the lack of education.
They do not even teach this in school.

Please forgive me for this disgusting topic, It's just something that needs to be spread.
Animals licking genitals is not a humorous occurrence.


While researching this, I found another boy had the same problem, and the "doctor" replied,
"that isn't possible."

This post has been edited by Gardon Thomas: 16 January 2012 - 12:47 AM

[iNow]

If your story about getting a dog to lick your junk is true, it's merely an interesting coincidence, but any STDs you have are not from your dog.

[Gardon Thomas]

what would make you say that?

saliva is one of the main ways of contracting sexual diseases.

where do you think they come from? dirt?

[Arete]

Human papillomavirus can only be contracted from another human. Your dog could not have given it to you.

[Tres Juicy]

Gardon Thomas, on 16 January 2012 - 12:46 AM, said:

HPV

Years back, I contracted an HPV from my dog.

using peanut butter I coaxed the dog into licking my penis until ejaculation, and have had an HPV ever since.

And you chose to share this publicly?

[John Cuthber]

Arete, on 16 January 2012 - 06:20 AM, said:

Human papillomavirus can only be contracted from another human. Your dog could not have given it to you.

I wouldn't normally tell this joke, but anyone who has read this far down the thread isn't going to be offended easily and it does raise a technically valid point.
Q
How can you tell when your sister is having her period?
A
The dog's dick tastes funny.

[Santalum]

Gardon Thomas, on 16 January 2012 - 12:46 AM, said:

HPV

Years back, I contracted an HPV from my dog.

using peanut butter I coaxed the dog into licking my penis until ejaculation, and have had an HPV ever since.


HOW IS THIS NOT COMMON KNOWLEDGE.

HPV's are very common, and this is probably directly influenced by the lack of education.
They do not even teach this in school.

Please forgive me for this disgusting topic, It's just something that needs to be spread.
Animals licking genitals is not a humorous occurrence.


While researching this, I found another boy had the same problem, and the "doctor" replied,
"that isn't possible."

Why didin't you just engage the services of Mrs Palmer and her five daughters?

[Tres Juicy]

Santalum, on 17 January 2012 - 04:18 AM, said:

Why didin't you just engage the services of Mrs Palmer and her five daughters?

Palmela Handerson?

[Santalum]

Tres Juicy, on 17 January 2012 - 08:26 AM, said:

Palmela Handerson?

[Gardon Thomas]

This was So far back I can care less if it's anonymous anymore;

I could never ask a girl to suck my dick, I wasn't going to try to have sex yet, I wanted to respectallt he girls I knew but wasn't ready for a serious relationship, and
I wanted to feel something like a tongue, which ought to feel semi-vagina like I figured on my dick.
bamn, STD. no respect there...

but my point is STD's can be directly transmitted from anonymous dogs to humans through saliva.

[Tres Juicy]

Gardon Thomas, on 17 January 2012 - 07:03 PM, said:

This was So far back I can care less if it's anonymous anymore;

I could never ask a girl to suck my dick, I wasn't going to try to have sex yet, I wanted to respectallt he girls I knew but wasn't ready for a serious relationship, and
I wanted to feel something like a tongue, which ought to feel semi-vagina like I figured on my dick.
bamn, STD. no respect there...

but my point is STD's can be directly transmitted from anonymous dogs to humans through saliva.

It's one thing to joke about it but if what you say is true then it's animal abuse which is not only illegal but morally wrong.

[zapatos]

Tres Juicy, on 17 January 2012 - 07:22 PM, said:

It's one thing to joke about it but if what you say is true then it's animal abuse which is not only illegal but morally wrong.

What abuse did the animal suffer? Would it have been abuse to lick the peanut butter off a finger? Does the lickee have to enjoy it for it to be abuse? Would it have been abuse if a person licked it as opposed to an animal?

You may not like it but I don't see how it rises to the level of abuse.

[Tres Juicy]

zapatos, on 17 January 2012 - 08:18 PM, said:

What abuse did the animal suffer? Would it have been abuse to lick the peanut butter off a finger? Does the lickee have to enjoy it for it to be abuse? Would it have been abuse if a person licked it as opposed to an animal?

You may not like it but I don't see how it rises to the level of abuse.

The moral point is debatable, but legally it's animal abuse

[zapatos]

Tres Juicy, on 17 January 2012 - 08:26 PM, said:

The moral point is debatable, but legally it's animal abuse

Maybe it is but what I'm mostly seeing is defintions like this:

Quote

Acts of violence or neglect perpetrated against animals are considered animal cruelty.

http://definitions.u...animal-cruelty/

I don't know if feeding him peanut butter via your junk is either violence or neglect, however you may experience your own violence or neglect if anyone finds out you did it.

And of course the definition of animal abuse can vary by state, so I wouldn't be surprised if in some places it is illegal.

[Tres Juicy]

zapatos, on 17 January 2012 - 08:36 PM, said:

Maybe it is but what I'm mostly seeing is defintions like this:


http://definitions.u...animal-cruelty/

I don't know if feeding him peanut butter via your junk is either violence or neglect, however you may experience your own violence or neglect if anyone finds out you did it.

And of course the definition of animal abuse can vary by state, so I wouldn't be surprised if in some places it is illegal.

In most places a sexual act performed on an animal will be illegal

[Gardon Thomas]

Of course it's morally wrong!
and my point is it should be illegal.

but if your so convinced you can't get an STD from it,
maybe you should take it from people who have contracted STD's from doing so!

this should be taught in school.

STD's are contracted from animals.

it is obvious

This post has been edited by Gardon Thomas: 17 January 2012 - 08:51 PM

[iNow]

Between this thread, and the other from this OP denying that gravity exists or we went to the moon, the guy is obviously just a bored moron with no friends looking to stir up shit... i.e. a troll.

[JustinW]

If he is a troll, he ain't that good at it.



Nice joke John.

[Moontanman]

Gardon Thomas, on 17 January 2012 - 08:50 PM, said:

Of course it's morally wrong!
and my point is it should be illegal.

I am pretty sure it is illegal, in my state at least, maybe where you live it isn't but that is a moral issue not related to the discussion of you trying to train your dog to give you fellatio...

Quote

but if your so convinced you can't get an STD from it,
maybe you should take it from people who have contracted STD's from doing so!

Sexually transmitted diseases come from having sex with other people who have these diseases, saying you got genital warts or some other disease from your dog is lame and disgusting not to mention dishonest .

Quote

this should be taught in school.

I'm not sure why you are saying these things unless you are drowning in a river in Egypt...

Quote

STD's are contracted from animals.

I agree, you get STD's from humans, which are animals...

Quote

it is obvious

Only to you dude...

Gardon Thomas, on 17 January 2012 - 07:03 PM, said:

This was So far back I can care less if it's anonymous anymore;

No problem for me if it's not for you...

Quote

I could never ask a girl to suck my dick, I wasn't going to try to have sex yet, I wanted to respectallt he girls I knew but wasn't ready for a serious relationship, and
I wanted to feel something like a tongue, which ought to feel semi-vagina like I figured on my dick.
bamn, STD. no respect there...

I am sorry but what is your point? Respectable girls don't do fellatio? Come on, you have warts on your penis and you are trying to explain it away as something that happened accidentally be a man, own it, you did something with some else who had genital warts and you got em from them, it's just how it works...

Quote

but my point is STD's can be directly transmitted from anonymous dogs to humans through saliva.

No, you are in denial, these things happen, own it and don't transmit it to anyone else...

[Appolinaria]

According to wikipedia;

"Human sexually transmitted diseases ("STDs") are not carried or transmitted by animals.
However, many human pathogens can survive in animal fluids for a limited time, and therefore STDs may theoretically be transmitted by an animal that has multiple consecutive human sexual partners in a short enough time frame to allow pathogen survival."

I can't find a source, though.