mad_scientist Posted October 23, 2017 Share Posted October 23, 2017 (edited) Prior to starting any romantic relationship with the opposite gender, is it always best to reveal each other's insecurities and character flaws or is is best to ignore them and leave them to be brought up later and only once a relationship has already commenced? If the latter, when you have reached how far into the relationship should you tell your partner about your own shortfalls/negative traits? If you tell/admit to the partner about your negative traits/insecurities/personality problems in the beginning, would this imply that you want them to accept you for who you are and not have them try to change you? If not, do you think your partner would think this if you were this upfront from the beginning? If you want yourself to improve on these negative traits that you have is it best to not mention your shortcomings in hope that you can improve yourself over time before your partner notices? E.g. let's say you are not good socially in a group setting. Should you tell your partner in the beginning or let them find out themselves with time? What's the best and ideal thing to do if you want your relationship to last longest? I lack life experience and so decided to start this thread to gain life advice from more experienced and rationally-minded people. So, what does everyone here normally do??? What is the most rational/logical thing to do from a scientific social science perspective?? Which tactic produces the most desirable long-term outcomes for all? Edited October 23, 2017 by mad_scientist Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dimreepr Posted October 23, 2017 Share Posted October 23, 2017 Relationships develop over time, not over a checklist. You don't want to scare them off with all your negative attributes before they learn to appreciate your positive ones and vice-versa. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Strange Posted October 23, 2017 Share Posted October 23, 2017 "What is your biggest character flaw?" "Honesty" "I don't think honesty is a fl...." "I don't give a **** what you think" 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dimreepr Posted October 23, 2017 Share Posted October 23, 2017 (edited) 28 minutes ago, Strange said: "What is your biggest character flaw?" "Honesty" "I don't think honesty is a fl...." "I don't give a **** what you think" LOL +1... Let me fill the gap just in case it's not obvious "does my arse look big in this?"... Edited October 23, 2017 by dimreepr Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StrontiDog Posted October 24, 2017 Share Posted October 24, 2017 21 hours ago, Strange said: "What is your biggest character flaw?" "Honesty" "I don't think honesty is a fl...." "I don't give a **** what you think" (From one perspective): ". . . . .I'm just meeting you because I'm willing to do what it takes to try and get into your bloomers." (From another perspective): ". . .I'm just doing this because I've got two kids, you've got a good job and a nice, roomy flat and I am willing to do what it takes to get into your wallet and bank account." Honesty is overrated. The advice I'd give is go ahead and tell the truth, but never tell the whole truth. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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