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Another one bites the dust.


koti

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This is depressing and I wish I had better news to share, another person I've known commited suicide. He was Dutch, he was in his late 30's, wife, two daughters. He left 2 letters for his family (don't know whats in them) He hung himself at his friends place, seems he planned it well ahead.

This is the 3rd guy I've known who killed himself in the last 4 years. All of them had families, no terminal diseases, no serious drug or alcohol problems. Its depressing as hell, what the f is happening, is it "that age" when people go for it or is there a wave of depression hitting people harder than before. This sucks :(

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I can't begin to understand. There are circumstances in which I can understand somebody deciding it is better to end it all, but I would have thought that a young family and the responsibilities it involves would be the greatest incentive ever to stay alive and be useful to people who obviously need you. 

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1 hour ago, DrKrettin said:

I can't begin to understand. There are circumstances in which I can understand somebody deciding it is better to end it all, but I would have thought that a young family and the responsibilities it involves would be the greatest incentive ever to stay alive and be useful to people who obviously need you. 

Sometimes the incentive is overwhelming... 

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The pure depressions not always have environmental/causative reasons to happen

I'm seeing my GP tomorrow to get myself fixed. Some familiar connection: my great-grandmother, my grandmother, my grandfather, my mother, my aunt, my brother, and now I have to deal with it.

Only thing that prevents me to end it myself is that I don't have the guts to. And perhaps because I cannot think of an elegant way to do so. And since I won't end it, my GP better gives me some SSRIs, which tend to work in all affected family members.

I know this is not so relevant to you, so sorry for that. I'm terribly sorry for your loss, and for him I am terribly sorry to imagine what pain he must have gone through.

Edited by Function
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On a related note, and I don't recall where I read it, but apparently suicide rates amongst teens have gone up 3000% since the 50s in the US.
I found that shocking.

That a young person with all his/her life ahead, would choose to end it all.
Why is there so much drama and angst among teens these days?

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1 hour ago, MigL said:

On a related note, and I don't recall where I read it, but apparently suicide rates amongst teens have gone up 3000% since the 50s in the US.
I found that shocking.

That a young person with all his/her life ahead, would choose to end it all.
Why is there so much drama and angst among teens these days?

There are studies indicating that exposure to suicide (via media, social media, other social relationships etc.) is correlated with increased suicide rates.  (E.g. Mueller et al Sociol Perspect. 2015). Social networks nowadays are more far-reaching than they used to be (and isolation is potentially perceived differently as well).

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4 minutes ago, CharonY said:

There are studies indicating that exposure to suicide (via media, social media, other social relationships etc.) is correlated with increased suicide rates.  (E.g. Mueller et al Sociol Perspect. 2015). Social networks nowadays are more far-reaching than they used to be (and isolation is potentially perceived differently as well).

I think that this is really a problem. I never went into researching this but the isolation the modern internet is causing is horrible. I don't know if it's only me but facebook became a really dark place in the last year or so compared to what it was like a few years back. The gap between what is represented by facebook and what is happening in real life is getting a lot wider...at least when I talk to people in real life and compare that to what they are like online is just becoming two completely different worlds. I'm saying this from the point of view of living with my family in every day life, I can't imagine being single and having to depend on online socializing these days. I used to do it myself but now it seems like something has changed...or maybe it's my subjective view and it's only in my head, I don't know.
Anyway, I think being online as long as I am does not do me well, I think I will need to take steps to cut down on the internet as I I never leave my phone, literally never and it never runs out of battery because I'm always carrying a portable charger with me, it's just ridiculous. When I'm at home I'm either by my PC or on my iphone again. Being without my phone for a couple of days when it was in service was borderline seizure like for me...I take it to the bathroom with me, when I go out for a smoke, it never leaves my hands.

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I'm sorry to hear about your friend. 

I think there is a sort of disconnection that goes on when you have to stop experiencing life in real time to record it or share it electronically. Without the phone, the experiences are yours, and I would argue they're richer because of it. With the phone, you're trying to show others how much fun you're having instead of having the fun for yourself. You can't rely on others to supply the joys in your life. You need to recognize them to experience them.

I also think too many people make decisions emotionally first, and then try to justify them critically later (which is another symptom of internet social groups that don't have much time to grab your attention). I think they often paint themselves into an emotional corner where it seems there's no way out, and critical thinking helps very little once you've made up your mind emotionally. 

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43 minutes ago, Phi for All said:

 

I think there is a sort of disconnection that goes on when you have to stop experiencing life in real time to record it or share it electronically. Without the phone, the experiences are yours, and I would argue they're richer because of it. With the phone, you're trying to show others how much fun you're having instead of having the fun for yourself.

Like this:

AC-2005-2013.png

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I carry my phone with me and use it all the time but its rarely for pictutes and I almost never post anything anymore anymore neither on FB nor other social media. I just notorilusly read science forums and sites and news sites. The exeption is pictures and films of our kid but I dont post that anywhere too exept that I upload it to a cloud for family to see. Today was the funeral, I didn't go but my other friend did. 

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For 30+ years portions of our society have been teaching their children that if they try hard enough they can be anything they want-- which totally ignores the reality of talent and ability.  This makes some people unable to cope with failure or even being "average."  For some people, it seems, being 30 and not yet rich and famous is very, very, depressing.

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2 hours ago, koti said:

I carry my phone with me and use it all the time but its rarely for pictutes and I almost never post anything anymore anymore neither on FB nor other social media. I just notorilusly read science forums and sites and news sites. The exeption is pictures and films of our kid but I dont post that anywhere too exept that I upload it to a cloud for family to see. Today was the funeral, I didn't go but my other friend did. 

Facebook brings out the ugly and banal in people, particularly interest/hobby pages. I  was on fishing groups until 2014 and the bitching got too much. The whole FB ecosystem leaves a bad taste for me. One-to-one, like Whatsapp, is a much more manageable and predictable socialising system. 

 

On 16/08/2017 at 4:44 PM, koti said:

This is depressing and I wish I had better news to share, another person I've known commited suicide. He was Dutch, he was in his late 30's, wife, two daughters. He left 2 letters for his family (don't know whats in them) He hung himself at his friends place, seems he planned it well ahead.

This is the 3rd guy I've known who killed himself in the last 4 years. All of them had families, no terminal diseases, no serious drug or alcohol problems. Its depressing as hell, what the f is happening, is it "that age" when people go for it or is there a wave of depression hitting people harder than before. This sucks :(

You are getting older, becoming less egocentric and starting to see what has been happening around you all your life; real life is coming into sharper focus and it becomes an ever increasing challenge to cope with it. Some people just probably  say "Fuck this". Mix that with a familial or endogenous depression and you've two  rather potent precursors for wanting to end your life. The trouble with depression is you cannot feel what is not there in the first place and loss/absence of empathy is one of the reasons why a person can kill themselves even though they have very substantial family responsibilities. 

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On 8/16/2017 at 2:59 PM, MigL said:

That a young person with all his/her life ahead, would choose to end it all.
Why is there so much drama and angst among teens these days?

You have to be a teenager in today's modern culture to understand.

And yes. I know being a teenager can be hard for every generation.

But there's been a massive change in the mindset of adults in the last few generations. And it's having a direct impact on teenagers.

I guarantee it.

 

 

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  • 2 weeks later...

I notice a lot of folk suffer with depression. The following link came in this morning, and I thought this might be of interest to people posting on this thread.

Research published in the open access journal Microbiome sheds new light on how gut bacteria may influence anxiety-like behaviors. Investigating the link between gut bacteria and biological molecules called microRNAs (miRNAs) in the brain; researchers at the APC Microbiome Institute at University College Cork, which is funded by Science Foundation Ireland, found that a significant number of miRNAs were changed in the brains of microbe-free mice. These mice are reared in a germ-free bubble and typically display abnormal anxiety, deficits in sociability and cognition, and increased depressive-like behaviors.
Full story at https://medicalxpress.com/news/2017-08-link-gut-bacteria-anxiety.html?utm_source=nwletter&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=weekly-nwletter

Is depression partly related to bad gut bacteria, or diet, as well as the usual hereditary factors.? Food for thought!

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