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is it deemed as sexual harassment ?


fresh

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1 hour ago, iNow said:

My best guess is he wants you to start thinking of sex and associate those thoughts with him.

I could be wrong, but I suspect he's testing the waters to see if you respond in a way that encourages more sexual discussions and potentially sexual situations between you both, or if you respond negatively. 

You are clearly uncomfortable and don't want it to continue. You need to make that clear. If it then continues after you've expressed your discomfort, then it becomes disrespectful, inappropriate, and potentially harrassment. 

I feel the same way, including that video, with no context also, of a woman losing her bikini bottom in a wave pool.

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5 minutes ago, John Cuthber said:

None of us is the woman to whom the picture + video were sent.

Therefor none of us is in a position to say it it constitutes "harassment".

 

This is true...  although the lady did ask for our opinions in the OP.

 

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19 minutes ago, John Cuthber said:

None of us is the woman to whom the picture + video were sent.

Therefor none of us is in a position to say it it constitutes "harassment".

But we are in a position to give our opinion.

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I just tried to explore one possibility of what is going on in the mind of the sender. He has a friend. He has developed, over time, an understanding of the friend's interests attitudes. He sees a video that amuses him and a photograph that he thinks is very artistic. He decides to share them with his friend (and perhaps other friends, besides). Unbeknown to him the friend is convinced she is being sexually harassed and is discussing it with anonymous persons on the internet. When he is finally confronted by an irate friend he is horrified that she has misinterpreted his intent and,more importantly, deeply hurt that she thought so little of their friendship she was not prepared to raise her discomfort at the outset.

As noted, it's just one possibility, but given the general absence of data it is one that deserves at least passing consideration.

Edited by Area54
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Tend to agree with Swansont and John C.

Everybody makes mistakes, misinterprets a relationship or drinks too much and sends a stupid pic.
That being said, harassment is in the 'eye of the beholder'.
If you find it offensive, tell him so, and if it continues IT IS definitely harassment.

If it stops, give him the benefit of the doubt.
Everyone who makes a stupid mistake deserves a second chance.
Otherwise, it wasn't much of a friendship to begin with.

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From the little information given in the OP, we know:

-OP received a revealing photo and a video of woman removing her bikini from a married friend of hers.

-OP feels annoyed/embarrassed by this action.

To me personally, I don't feel that is harassment yet. If you inform your friend that you do not approve of him sending you this kind of images or videos, and he does not stop, then it becomes harassment.

Furthermore, it's your friend! If you did not click on some level, you would not be friends. Before you are quick to end your friendship, find out the facts.

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I think he is horny. He is very much into pretty girls. He says he would get a UKrainian girl if he divorced. His wife is pretty too.

We know UKrainian girls are very beautiful.

i decide to keep distance from him.

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16 minutes ago, fresh said:

I think he is horny.

Which is his very right.

17 minutes ago, fresh said:

We know UKrainian girls are very beautiful.

No we don't.

17 minutes ago, fresh said:

i decide to keep distance from him.

Well, good on you.

May I ask about the conclusions you draw from the discussions hereabove?

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3 minutes ago, Function said:

Which is his very right.

No we don't.

Well, good on you.

May I ask about the conclusions you draw from the discussions hereabove?

Don't like the way you ask.

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19 hours ago, Function said:

It seems like we're the coin you're flipping, although you already hope for a certain outcome.

It namely seems like you want us to call it sexual harrassment, and keep coming with arguments to do so. And it's your very right to do so.

I have this male friend, and to this male friend, I send the craziest stuff which could get us in psychiatric wards if it leaked. Getting a boyfriend won't change the status from the stuff I send and receive to/from this friend from 'normal' (lol) to sexual harrassment. But if I were to send it to random other friends, things could get really awkward.

I dont like the way you speak. It is like you point your finger on me that I come here to push others to agree with me. I really don't like you. What are you mad at? 

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If you don't want to lose friend, simply say that he sent two messages to probably wrong contact in his address book (things like this are common these days, if f.e. couple contacts start with the same letter, and somebody type faster than think), with naked women (if you deleted them and cannot show him them anymore), and you think they were addressed to his wife instead of you. He will probably answer something like "OMG, you're right! I sent them by mistake! Excuse me."..

Edited by Sensei
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4 hours ago, fresh said:

Should I start a new thread for this  3 minus? Why I deserve it ?

I need justice from administers.

It is ill advised to accuse people of things without evidence. It was not who you claim. Unofficially, please try and stay on topic. This is clearly (and understandably) emotional for you, but you should not assume that people here are out to seek revenge on behalf of your friend. Likewise, while it is fine to not agree with or like someone's post, it isn't appropriate (nor is it fair) to then extend that to telling someone you don't like them, or other such personal comments. Particularly when you seem to have missed the point of the post. 

If the responses in this thread are upsetting you too much, or you are not prepared to deal with responses unaligned with what you want to hear, it might be best you step away from it. To that end, I am happy to close the thread. 

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1 hour ago, Sensei said:

If you don't want to lose friend, simply say that he sent two messages to probably wrong contact in his address book (things like this are common these days, if f.e. couple contacts start with the same letter, and somebody type faster than think), with naked women (if you deleted them and cannot show him them anymore), and you think they were addressed to his wife instead of you. He will probably answer something like "OMG, you're right! I sent them by mistake! Excuse me."..

Thanks, I took your advice already.

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